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By Stuart Carapola on 2012-08-09 19:58:00
Welcome to the Impact Wrestling Report, live here on!

Bully Ray starts us off by coming out to the ring with his Twittah Machine to proclaim himself the leader of the Bully Nation. Bubba says he learned something from Joseph Park, and that's that if there's enough evidence, it means someone's guilty, and all the evidence is pointing right at James Storm. He's going to prove that Storm is behind Aces & Eights, but first he's going to beat him and then go on to Hardcore Justice and win there too and get 20 points. He tells the crowd to stop booing because they know he's right, but Storm comes out to interrupt Bubba's monologue. He says that he didn't hear one fact come out of Bubba's mouth, and says he's tired of people pointing fingers at him and not taking him at his word. He'll say it again: he's had nothing to do with these attacks because he's more worried about winning the Bound For Glory Series, then going on to Bound For Glory to regain his title. Bubba's got him all riled up, and where he's from, you kick the crap out of people who cross the line, so what he's going to do now is draw a line and give Bubba until the count of three because he's going to cross that line and knock Bubba out. Bubba turns his hat around and tells Storm to start counting, but Bubba steps out of the ring at 3, so Storm tells him to take the message backstage and tell anyone who doesn't believe him that they can come out and fight him.

Suddenly, Aces & Eights shows up on the ImpactTron, sitting at a card table with a bunch of beers to tell the assholes (their word, not mine) that they found out that Sting gave them an open invitation to show up tonight. That's a dangerous thing to do, but they'll show up tonight and do things on their terms. Bubba says that this proves Storm's involved, and walks off while screaming at Storm.

Pope is backstage saying the Bound For Glory Series hasn't gone quite the way he imagined, but he's picking up 20 points this weekend because, if he makes it to the final four, he's going to Bound For Glory and bringing the title home to the Congregation.

Ken Anderson joins the announce team for our opening match...

Bound For Glory Series: Rob Van Dam vs Brutus Magnus

RVD hits the ropes and tries a shoulderblock, but doesn't budge Magnus. RVD tries the ropes again and Magnus quickly pounces and clotheslines RVD over the top rope to the floor. Magnus goes out after him, ramming RVD's back into the ring apron and then putting the boots to him before dumping him back into the ring for a 1 count. RVD comes off the ropes and tries a crossbody, but Magnus catches him in a bodyslam position, then pops him into the air into a vertical suplex and drops him. RVD goes to the ropes yet a fourth time, and finally connects with a leg lariat. Magnus catches a spinkick, but RVD catches him with a rolling leg cradle for 2 before superkicking Magnus' head off. RVD takes too long to play to the crowd and his monkey flip is countered to a hard clothesline, but he quickly recovers and takes Magnus down, then hits the Five Star Frogsplash for the win.

Winner: Rob Van Dam

The dumbass with the camera asks Bobby Roode if he's aware of the contract signing tonight, and he says that he hears there's some language in the contract his lawyer didn't like, and they might just not let him wrestle this weekend.

We look back at last week's baby shower for Crazy Crackhead Claire, and then we're off to the ring for some championship action!

World Tag Team Title Match: Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian vs TV Champion Devon & Garett Bischoff

Kazarian and Devon start off, with Devon getting the advantage and tagging out to Garett, who does fiery young babyface armdrags and hiptosses before tagging Devon back in for a double team on Daniels. Is Garett ever going to get any damn tights? Garett with an inverted atomic drop on Daniels, but a distraction from Kazarian on the floor allows Daniels to hit an STO and then hiptoss Kazarian into a legdrop on Garett for 2. The champs work Garett over for several minutes before tagging in Devon, who is a house of fire as he takes both champions out. Devon with a Rock Bottom for 2 on Kazarian, then he dumps Daniels to the floor and spears Kazarian out of his boots. Daniels comes into the ring with a title belt and Garett charges him, but Daniels backdrops Garett over the top rope to the floor. Devon hits a spinebuster on Daniels, but Kazarian gets the belt and knocks Devon out with it and covers for 3.

Winners: Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian

We look back at last week's conversation between Sting and Brooke Hogan where she wondered why Aces & Eights were picking on them before getting a delivery from Aces & Eights. We then go backstage to Sting and he says that he promised to take care of Brooke, and the best way to do that is by not having her here tonight. That sounds great to me! He's also calling out Aces & Eights once again tonight.

After a video package with each of the BFG Series participants talking about what it would mean for them to win the tournament, we go to the ring where Robbie E says that he's got five points, and that he's going to earn another 20 points by putting Jeff Hardy, the same guy he beat for those five points, through a table. He shows us the video of his win over Hardy, and he says that he'll give five reasons Hardy won't ever beat him. He only gets as far as mentioning his cool pink sweaters that are better than Hardy's grungy wife beaters, but now Jeff Hardy comes out as Robbie dares him to join the party. Hardy comes into the ring and lays out Robbie T, and E decides to backpedal until Hardy slaps him in the face and tries to put him through a table. Robbie T comes back into the ring and attacks Hardy from behind, then powerbombs Hardy through a table. Robbie E stands over the fallen Hardy yelling that he's going to take 20 points this weekend.

The guy with the camera catches up with AJ Styles, who says someone has to be pretty bad at sex for people to not remember having sex with them, and AJ doesn't drink so he should remember if it happened. He's jet lagged, and all he wants to do right now is focus on his match tonight with Kurt Angle.

Samoa Joe comes out to the broadcast booth before the next match and says that it seems like everyone's coming out to say what they're going to in the BFG Series. He says that we're about to see Kurt Angle and AJ Styles go at it, and he's going to beat the both of them and also Christopher Daniels because he's been dueling for the top spot since the series started and he's going to get the 20 points this weekend.

Bound For Glory Series: Kurt Angle vs AJ Styles

Claire is in the crowd, cheering AJ on his way to the ring. A quick back and forth at the beginning ends with AJ dropkicking Angle out to the floor and taking him out with a baseball slide as we go to commercial.

We're back, and Angle rams AJ hard into the corner and pops him into the air with an overhead release suplex. Claire has this moron smile on her face as she's sitting in the crowd watching Angle hit a windmill backbreaker for 2. Double clothesline takes both men down, and Claire looks on intently as they try and get back to their feet. AJ with a series of clotheslines and a fireman's backbreaker for 2. AJ goes to the apron and tries a springboard forearm, but Angle dodges and hits a trio of rolling German suplexes. He says, and I quote, "GET UP BITCH!" to AJ, but AJ escapes the Hacker Slam and hits a Pelle Kick for a very close 2. Angle backdrops out of the Styles Clash and hits the Hacker Slam for 2. Angle calls AJ a bitch again as he pulls the straps down and gets the anklelock, but AJ kicks Angle off and gets a German suplex, Angle blocks a second suplex and counters to the anklelock, AJ rolls through and sends Angle into the corner, Angle backdrops AJ to the apron, and AJ comes in with a springboard forearm and hits the Styles Clash for an EXTREMELY close 2. We've got to be getting closed to the time limit by now as AJ goes to the top rope and gets suplexed into the ring for 2. Angle goes to the top rope, but shockingly misses the moonsault he hasn't hit since 2000, AJ goes out to the apron and tries the springboard 450, but Angle gets the knees up and hits the Hacker Slam for a very hard fought win.

Winner: Kurt Angle

This match was awesome! Awesome awesome awesome! Claire reaches over the rail like a mark to tell AJ it's okay that he lost, but he just stares her down and walks off. Now Claire gets her Crazy Crackhead Claire face on as we find out Aces & Eights has another message for us.

Aces & Eights runs down all the people they've taken out so far, and tonight, we'll find out who gets the next Dead Man's Hand. Ken Anderson walks in on James Storm to say it's pretty funny how every time A&E does anything, it benefits Storm in some way. If Anderson turns out to be their next victim and finds out Storm has anything to do with it, they're going to have another conversation like this one, except...different.

Austin Aries is on the phone arguing with someone about the contract for this weekend's title match, and the camera guy asks him what's up. Aries says he doesn't know what's going on, but they're going to handle this like men and make sure there's a match this Sunday.

Gail Kim vs Knockouts Champion Brooke Tessmacher

Gail tried attacking Brooke before the bell, but Brooke saw her coming and took her out. Kim quickly recovers and unloads with some kicks, then picks Brooke up in a powerslam position and drops her belly first over her shoulder for 2. Gail lays Brooke backward across the second rope and stands on her chest, then just punishes Brooke with more kicks before driving her boot into her chest. Brooke comes off the ropes with a running forearm and starts firing back with right hands, but Gail gets a shot to the ribs and locks her in a legscissors. Gail releases the hold and rams her leg into Brooke's ribs just for good measure, then lifts her up and gets a ribbuster across the knee. Tessmacher finally gets some offense with some running clotheslines and a dropkick before springing off the second rope with a clothesline. Brooke with a stinkface in the corner and then hangs Gail on the second rope before hauling her out and dropping her face first in a sort of modified bulldog for the win.

Winner: Brooke Tessmacher

Brooke is celebrating her win as Madison Rayne comes out with her big silly smile on to stare down Brooke and make out with Earl Hebner, whose heart appears to have stopped.

We go backstage to Joseph Park, who says he deals with contracts on a professional basis and it brings him back to 2003 when he had a shining moment in a closing argument. This is the kind of thing he tried to warn Sting about last week, because animosity like what we see between Aries and Roode can cause all kinds of problems in contract negotiations.

We look back at last week when Kenny King pinned Zema Ion, then we go to a video package where King talks about taking the biggest risk of his career to come to TNA, but every morning when he gets up to go train and slaps the hamburger out of his own hand, he thinks about what it will feel like to have that championship belt in his hand.

Sting comes out to the ring to introduce the contract signing, and asks Bobby Roode and Austin Aries to come out and join him in the ring. Both men come out to the ring and Aries puts the belt on the table and sits down, and then Roode goes off on Sting for telling him that he has an attitude problem. He has a problem with the line in the contract where he won't get another shot at Aries for as long as he holds the title if he loses this weekend, and he thinks it's because Sting has had a problem with him since day one. Sting has always tried to stick it to him and one up him, and even after Aries' fluke win last month, he's still trying to one up him. Unless Sting makes some changes this weekend, there's not going to be a main event this weekend, and Roode tosses the contract onto the table. Aries says he's tired of listening to Roode piss and moan because, for a man who's so convinced that Aries' win was a fluke, he's awfully concerned about a rematch. Roode knows that Aries has his number, and since he doesn't want to give Roode any more reasons to complain, he can toss the contract out and add a new stipulation where he'll waive his right to a rematch if he loses, so this weekend will be a winner take all match and their one last confrontation. Sting asks Roode to shake on it, and it looks like everyone is in agreement. They do the obligatory kicking over of chairs and get ready to go at it, but instead, Roode sticks his hand out and they shake on it. Aries grabs his belt and holds it up in Roode's face, so Roode throws his water in Aries face and strolls off.

James Storm and Bully Ray are backstage, and they're...WALKING!

Chavo Guerrero Jr is backstage saying that he's here to beat the best, and before long, he and Hernandez will have gold around their waist. Kid Kash and Gunner aren't impressed because they think Chavo is a cheater. Those two teams are going to face off this weekend at the PPV, and then we run down the entire lineup for Hardcore Justice We then look at the BFG Series leaderboard, and then it's off to the ring for our main event!

Bound For Glory Series: Bully Ray vs James Storm

Bubba starts mouthing off and accusing Storm of being part of Aces & Eights before even making contact, and keeps ducking out between the ropes every time Storm tries to grab him, but finally they make contact and have a brief exchange before Bubba dumps Storm out to the floor and we go to commercial.

We're back, and Storm rolls out of the way of an elbowdrop from Bully Ray. Bubba yanks Storm down by the hair and then gets a leglock on Storm and grapevines the leg to try for the submission win. Storm reverses to a heel hook of his own, but Bubba makes it to the ropes and takes Storm down, then stands over him and drives fists into his skull. Bubba comes off the ropes for a big splash, but Storm rolls out of the way and starts firing back with right hands, a facebuster, and a running neckbreaker. Storm with a BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK bodydrop and then charges Bubba, but gets caught with a Rock Bottom for 2. Bubba goes for the Bubba Bomb, but Storm fights his way out and goes up top. Bubba hits a nasty chop and tries to superplex Storm, but Storm shoves him off. Storm goes for an elbowdrop, but Bubba moves out of the way and hits the Bubba Bomb, but only gets 2. Bubba goes to the second rope, but misses a back senton. Storm hits a Codebreaker and sets up for the Last Call, but Bubba pulls the referee in his way. Storm stops short, but gets a rollup for 2. Bubba quickly recovers himself and hits the Bubba Cutter for the win.

Winner: Bully Ray

Bubba stalks Storm with the chain, but Aces & Eights pops up on screen and congratulates them on putting on a good show, then says that they'll see Bubba this Sunday.

Thanks for reading tonight's Impact Wrestling Report, I'll be back to discuss Impact and more tomorrow with Dave Scherer on the Stu & Pid Show!

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