We start off tonight’s show with a look back at last week’s Impact when Awesome Kong defeated Gail Kim to win the TNA Women’s Title. We also saw Payton Banks attack Traci Brooks in a hostile takeover. We then go to footage from Booker T’s interview from last week and how he is going to seek revenge on Robert Roode. We see Shark Boy get destroyed by Tomko. We also see Kevin Nash and Samoa Joe continue their feud. Team 3D raises the stakes in their battle with the X Division. We hear Christian’s comments about A.J. Styles. What will happen when A.J. Styles, Christian Cage, and Samoa Joe battle to see who faces Kurt Angle at Against All Odds or maybe not.
We see Jeremy Borash open the AngleMobile and we see Kurt Angle, his wife Karen, and his Prince A.J. Jeremy is angry that he did not get the memo about the tuxedos and Kurt wonders where ‘we’ came from. Eric Young stops by when he hears about Christmas and Kurt tells Eric that Santa is in the car and Angle closes the door behind him. Angle says that it is not only Christmas tonight, but A.J. has a Triple Threat Match tonight against Samoa Joe and Christian Cage and if A.J. wins, Kurt has two months off. Jeremy points out that A.J. could face Angle but Kurt and Karen say that will not happen. They all walk away while Eric waits in the limo for Santa.
We are live on tape from Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida and your announcers are Don ‘Ballyhoo’ West and Mike ‘TNA’ Tenay.
Jay Lethal, Chris Sabin, and Alex Shelley come to the ring and Alex has a microphone with him as they come to the ring. Alex points out that after they won last week, they heard the challenge from Team 3D. Alex goes over the stipulations for the challenge and if they lose, the X Division disbands. Alex says that they are good enough to win the TNA Tag Team Titles and Alex points out that Jay defeated Kurt Angle so he can be the TNA Heavyweight Champion. Alex says that if they win, they will change the X Division and institute a weight division. The limit will be 275 pounds. Alex says that there will be weekly weigh-ins.
Team 3D and Johnny Devine interrupt Alex with a bunch of blahs and he says that he already weighs 275. Ray says that Devon is a little over 300 because he is trying to compete in Mr. Olympia. Ray says that they are in the best shape of their lives. Ray says that Devon could be on the cover of Jet Magazine and Devon poses. Ray wants to make sure he understands that when they win, the X Division will go back under the tiny rock.
Team 3D and Devine come to the ring and they want to make sure they have it right and Lethal says that that is the case. Ray wants to shake hands but they are hesitant and tell the fans not to tell them what to do. Lethal, Sabin, and Shelley ambush Team 3D and Devine as they leave the ring. Sabin hits Ray with the kendo stick in the ring while security makes their way to the ring and separate everyone. Matt Morgan has joined security. We go
TO THE BACK and Crystal is with Abyss and she points out that tonight will be the night that the secret is revealed. Abyss says that the secret emerges tonight over his dead body. AbyssChris says that the revelation will mark the end of Father James Mitchell and Judas Mesias. We go to commercial.
We are back and we have a Moments Ago Moment of the handshake heard round the X Division.
We see footage from Shark Boy taking.
Jeremy Borash is with Shark Boy and he is in a coma with his Shark Family. Jeremy asks Dr. Scott Fishman about Shark Boy’s condition. The doctor says that life as Shark Boy knows it has floundered. The doctor throws in a few more puns as the family cries.
Match Number One: Tomko versus Eric Young
We go to the limo and Eric is still in the limo. Sonjay and others are trying to encourage Eric to open the door.
Eric finally enters the Impact Zone and he is knocked down by the pyro.
The match finally begins and Eric with a side head lock. Tomko picks up Eric but Eric gets back to his feet. Eric offers his hand to Tomko and Tomko cannot believe what he sees. Eric pulls his hand back before Tomko shakes it. Tomko with a tilt-a-whirl power slam for a two count. Tomko with a form of a cravate on Young and turns it into a reverse chin lock. Young gets Tomko up and hits a version of a Death Valley Driver but he misses a moonsault and Tomko responds with a clothesline for the three count.
Winner: Tomko
After the match, James Storm attacks Young and hits Eye of the Storm while Tomko celebrates in the ring. Storm stands over Young and slaps him. Tomko cannot believe that Storm is doing this while in the ring. Storm offers Tomko a beer and they drink. Tomko kicks Storm and throws Storm over the top rope to the floor. Tomko picks up Young’s belt and gives him a beer before heading to the back. We go
TO THE BACK where Crystal is with Christian. Christian says that Tomko was not told to think and that he would be his own man. Christian has no problem with Tomko being on his own, unlike A.J. who stabbed him in the back. Christian says that he will prove tonight that he is the best. Joe is going to come to the ring to prove that he deserves more money. A.J. is going to come to the ring tonight to protect Angle and his trick Karen. Christian says that he will face Kurt Angle at Against All Odds. We go to commercial.
We are back and Crystal is with Dustin Rhodes at Black Reign’s workshop. Dustin hides under the table looking for Black Reign.
We see footage of Gail Kim losing the title to Awesome Kong from last week.
Match Number Two: ODB versus Angelina Love
Angelina Love is attacked while she enters the ring and ODB with punches. ODB with a chop to Angelina but Angelina fights back. ODB with an Irish whip into the corner and then she takes down Angelina for a near fall. ODB with a forearm to the back and then she sends Angelina head first into the turnbuckle. ODB goes to the turnbuckles and she misses a cross body ODB checks to see if she is okay up top. Angelina with forearms and a chop. ODB with an Irish whip but Angelina with a kick to the head followed by a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. Angelina with a jaw breaker and a near fall. Angelina with a running knee lift followed by a kick to ODB for a near fall. ODB with a clothesline to Angelina. ODB hits a running power slam for the three count.
Winner: ODB
After the match, ODB gets on the mic and she has a message for the TNA Women’s Champion. ODB says that Awesome Kong has beaten every broad in TNA except ODB. ODB has an idea that she meet Awesome Kong at Against All Odds for the TNA Women’s Title. ODB says that she loves to fight and some times she loves to get whooped. ODB says that she is not just another pretty face. We go
TO THE BACK where Crystal is at Kevin Nash’s dressing room. Nash is talking to someone. He says that talk is cheap and if ‘he’ wins, he will get the title shot, success and money. Nash says that it is up to him and it is time to light the fuse. We see that Joe was the person that Nash was talking to. We go to commercial.
We are back to ballyhoo and it is time for more Shark Boy updates.
We are back on day two and Chris Harris is there and he tells Jeremy Borash that this is ridiculous. Chris Harris says that he has resorted to hanging out with sharks. Harris wants to know how Shark Boy got all of this time. LAX arrives and they say that they want to check on Shark Boy. Harris goes through his list of complaints while we see Homicide and Hernandez look at the items in the room. Salinas takes a surfboard. Chris Harris wonders why Jeremy does not drive him.
We see footage of Frankie Kazarian winning over Black Reign at Final Resolution
Match Number Two: Senshi versus Frankie Kazarian
Senshi with a punch and chop at the start of the match. Frankie punches and chops back. Senshi misses a clothesline but Frankie does not miss. Frankie misses a few kicks but Senshi hits a rolling kick followed by a head butt. Senshi with kicks to the chest and then Senshi chokes Frankie in the corner. Kazarian with punches but Senshi with a drop kick for a two count. Senshi with a waist lock while Frankie is on the mat. Frankie gets to his feet. Frankie with elbows but Senshi with a knee for a near fall. Senshi with a chop to Frankie and they move to another corner. Frankie with a sunset flip followed by a drop kick. Frankie with a spinning leg sweep followed by a springboard corkscrew leg drop. Frankie with a forearm but Senshi with a chop. Senshi with a kick to Frankie and he misses a charge into the corner. Frankie with a bicycle kick and then he goes for the hesitation baseball slide. Frankie hits Wave of the Future for the three count.
Winner: Frankie Kazarian
After the match, Black Reign hits Frankie with his pick axe and Dustin picks up Marlena’s case and she is not in there. Black Reign hits Frankie with the cage and then he punches Frankie before security separates them. We go
TO THE BACK where Jeremy Borash is with James Mitchell and Judas Mesias is standing behind. Mitchell says that in a little while he is going to reveal a secret that is over twenty years old. All of the lies, treachery and duplicity will be revealed to the world. It will change Chrissbyss’s life forever. We go to commercial.
We are back with ballyhoo and even more ballyhoo as we go to the back where A.J. says that Tomko knows what to do because he is super smart. A.J. asks Tomko for advice but Tomko wants to know if A.J. got the crown in a happy meal. A.J. wants some advice and he wants to know if he should take the title shot or give Angle two months off. Tomko says that A.J. was one half of the tag team champions without Kurt so he can be Heavyweight Champion without Kurt. Tomko tells A.J. to do what is right.
Match Number Three: Lance Hoyt with Jimmy Rave versus Abyss Parks
Abyss looks around the building and then he locks up with Rave. Abyss charges into an elbow but Abyss with a slam. Chris with a charge into the corner and then Parks clotheslines Hoyt over the top to the floor. Abyss presses an interfering Jimmy Rave and tosses him onto Hoyt.
Father James Mitchell comes out and he says that it is time for Chris to reveal the secret. Jim Mitchell has a cameraman go with him
The match continues and Hoyt attacks Abyss but Abyss with punches to Hoyt and then he punches Rave on the apron. Hoyt with an F-5 to Abyss and then he goes up top for a moonsault but he misses when Abyss moves. Abyss Parks with a Black Hole Slam for the three count.
Winner: AbyssChrisParks
James Mitchell says that it is time for the secret to come out. Mitchell says that Tenay asked about the obsession but it goes back to the day that Abyss was born. Chris was the apple of mommy’s eye and she let him do crazy things. When the only sane person had a chance to discipline him, it got violent. Then she went after Chris when she got disciplined. Mitchell talks about the night when the bi-polar b**** shoot an innocent man three times. Every time when Chris cries, he says that he feels one . . . two . . . three bullets rip through his flesh. No matter how much he lies or whines. Whether he changes his name to his mother’s maiden name of Parks, you cannot hide from the truth. He reveals that Father James Mitchell takes a new meaning because he is Abyss’s father. We go to commercial.
We are back and we have a Moments Ago Moment of Father James Mitchell revealing that he is a father in more than name only.
Don and Mike talk about the momentous occasion that happened just moments ago.
We go to Crystal who is following Abyss and he heads out of the Impact Zone.
We see footage of Payton Banks replacing Traci Brooks at the side of Robert Roode Incorporated.
Match Number Four: Robert Roode with Payton Banks versus Sonjay Dutt
Sonjay hugs Roode and then he tries to hug Payton but Roode attacks Dutt from behind. Roode with a waist lock but Dutt with an elbow. Roode with a clothesline followed by a drop toe hold. Dutt with a drop kick and then he charges into a boot. Dutt with a drop kick and Roode goes out of the ring. Dutt with a somersault plancha. Payton grabs Dutt’s leg and that allows Roode to knock Dutt off the apron. Roode sends Dutt back in and Traci Brooks comes out. The referee sends Traci to the back as we go to commercial.
We are back and Dutt punches Roode and Dutt kicks Roode. Roode with a spinebuster for a near fall. We see Payton and Traci at ringside as the action continues in the ring. Roode with a chop to Dutt. Dutt moves when Roode charges into the corner and Dutt with a kick to the head. Dutt with a tilt-a-whirl head scissors followed by a springboard clothesline. Dutt with a springboard seated senton for a two count. Roode sends Dutt to the apron and then Dutt tries for another springboard move but Roode hits the ropes and Dutt lands hard. Roode with the Payoff for the three count.
Winner: Robert Roode
Traci Brooks comes into the ring and we have a fight between the two women. Brooks slaps Roode and then she spears Banks. Banks slaps Brooks while Roode holds him. Matt Morgan comes to the ring to make the save. We go
TO THE BACK where A.J. Styles is with Jeremy Borash and Karen Angle. Jeremy asks A.J. what will he do if he wins the match tonight. A.J. says that he thought long and hard and Karen says that A.J. will do the right thing, what Karen wants. Karen says that she will do the right thing for the Prince of Phenomenal. We go
TO ANOTHER PART OF THE BACK where BG James tells Kip James that his partner is on his way. Kip wishes him luck while Crystal and Roxxi watch. We go to commercial.
We are back and ballyhoo time as we have a dire situation in the Shark Tank. It is now Tuesday and the women are here. Angelina Love and Velvet Sky come to visit. Angelina says that it is time for Mouth to Mouth but Shark Dad gets on top and they leave.
The Voodoo Kin Mafia is in the ring and Kip says that there are two people who are fixing to get their ass kicked. Kip reminds BG about what led to tonight’s situation. He handed BG a title shot and now he does not want to be his partner. They have been partners for ten years. He has always been there for Kip. BG says that gave Kip ten of the best years of his life and he demands five minutes of Kip’s time. BG says that he has been lucky . . . blessed enough to see some of his dreams come true. He dreamt of becoming a professional wrestler. He dreamt about being at the top of the wrestling world and he has done it. He has had a hero for his entire life and it is a professional wrestler. A man who fought for his family. BG says that his partner made him everything that he is and gave him everything that he has. BG brings out his partner, Bob My Daddy Armstrong. Bob comes to the ring and he hugs Kip. We go to commercial.
Back for ballyhoo and Shark Boy’s death bed vigil. It is now Wednesday and the doctor and nurse are back. Eric Young has arrived and he gives Shark Boy the Brian’s Song pep talk and unlike Brian Piccolo, Shark Boy wakes up and he sounds like Steve Austin.
Kurt Angle comes to the ring after rising in the AngleVator and he is in his tuxedo. Kurt says that two great things are going to happen. His protégé Prince AJkaea is going to win the Triple Threat Match against Samoa Joe and Christian Cage so he will not have to defend his title until Lockdown. After tonight’s show, Global Impact will see Angle defend his other alleged World Titles in Japan against Yuji Nagata. We go
TO JIM CORNETTE’S OFFICE. Jim talks about the meaning of the X Division. It is about putting your body on the line. Jim stops Petey from interrupting while he tries to push the idea of Steiner being an X Division champion. Cornette says that it is the chance to show that he is the best at what he does. Steiner says that he is the best and he takes his X Division title briefcase and leaves.
Match Number Five: Prince A.J.Kaea versus Samoa Joe versus Christian Cage in a Number One Contender Match contested as a Three Way Dance
Christian goes after A.J. and kicks and punches him while Joe watches. Joe with kicks to Styles. Joe and Christian with a double back body drop and Styles rolls out of the ring. Christian with a kick to Joe but Joe with a jumping leg lariat. Christian with a punch to Joe and Styles pulls Christian out of the ring. Joe tries for a suicide dive but Styles moves out of the way. Styles tries for a suicide dive and Joe with a kick to A.J. Christian with a cross body but Joe moves out of the way and Christian hits Styles. Joe with a suicide dive onto Christian and A.J. and we go to commercial.
We are back and Joe chops A.J. Styles in the ring while Christian is relaxing on the floor. Joe with a reverse atomic drop followed by a Yakuza kick. Christian hits Joe from behind and then Joe tosses Christian onto A.J. Joe with a chop, kick, and knee combination and then Joe and Christian with clotheslines at the same time and all three are down.
Christian sends A.J. to the floor and then Joe with a scoop power slam for a two count. Joe with slaps to Christian but Christian sends Joe to the floor. Styles with a springboard forearm to Christian. Styles signals for the Styles Clash but Christian counters into a Cloverleaf and he arcs back while Joe watches. Joe with a kick to Christian on the apron and then Joe with an Irish whip and running back elbow followed by a jumping spin kick. Joe tries for the muscle buster on Christian but Christian gets out of the hold. Joe sends Christian into the ropes right when A.J. tries for a springboard move and A.J. goes down and he goes down hard. Christian knocks the ref down inadvertently. Christian sets for the Unprettier but Joe has Christian in the choke. A.J. grabs a chair and Styles misses when he uses it. Styles jabs the chair into Joe’s midsection and then he hits Christian with the chair. Joe with a running Yakuza kick into the chair. Joe has the chair and the referee turns around and he disqualifies Joe.
Joe grabs the referee and Matt Morgan tells Joe to get to the back. Kevin Nash comes out and he gets between Joe and Morgan as we go to commercial.
We are back and Christian and A.J. are down. They return to their feet and Christian with chops. Styles tries for the moonsault into the inverted DDT but Christian blocks it momentarily until Styles can hit the DDT. Styles punches Christian but Christian with chops. Styles with a spinebuster for a near fall. Styles slaps Christian in the corner. Styles with an Irish whip but he charges into a boot and then he misses a splash into the corner. Christian with a clothesline. Christian goes up top for a frog splash but A.J. moves out of the way. Styles with a kick and then he sets for the Styles Clash. Christian with an inverted DDT for a two count. Christian with chops in the corner and then he chokes A.J. Styles with a kick and punches. Christian with a chop but Styles tries for a Phenomenal rana but Christian counters with a power bomb for a two count. Christian sets for the Unprettier but Styles counter for a belly-to-back suplex but Christian lands on his feet. Styles with the Pele kick and Styles goes up top. Christian with a spear for a two count. Styles with a double thrust to Christian and then he sends Christian to the apron. Christian goes up top but Styles stops Christian and back body drops him to the mat. Styles tries for the Spiral Tap but Christian moves and Christian gets a near fall. Christian goes up top and goes for a frog splash but A.J. gets his knees up. Styles tries for an Unprettier but Christian counters for an Unprettier for the three count.
Winner: Christian Cage
Christian Cage stands over A.J. and we go to credits. Impact Thoughts:
The Matches and their daddies:
If they could find two people from different ends of the wrestling spectrum, they could not have done a better job than Eric Young and Tomko. Tomko has been the best character in this company while Eric Young has been a character. Will we ever see A.J. and Tomko wrestle as a team again?
The ODB/Angelina Love match was okay, but it was not at the same level as the previous women’s matches. ODB is in the level right below Kong and Gail Kim so this is the time for her to get to the next level. I wish that they would let Roxxi Laveaux get a chance to showcase her talent along with Payton Banks (assuming she will be wrestling against Traci Brooks).
For someone familiar with the history of the Abyss/Lance Hoyt feud, it was not a good match because you know that they could do a lot more than what we saw.
The Robert Roode/Sonjay Dutt match was okay for its purpose and that was to build the feud between Robert Roode and Traci Brooks.
I really liked the main event with the exception of the way that Joe got disqualified from the match. It shows that if you have a basic match with no outside interference during the match it can still be a good match.
The Angles and their daddies
While I would normally spend a few pages to discuss things on the show outside of the matches. I want to change things up by commenting primarily on the positive things with a few other comments sprinkled in. Also, you can only complain about the same things each week without coming off as overly negative.
I thought the Team 3D/Johnny Devine/Motor City Machine Guns/Jay Lethal segment was okay but one feature of the X Division has always been about ‘no limits.’ Now they want to impose a weight limit on the division. At least they showed the faces as being more aggressive in this segment and builds to their latest pay per view stipulation.
Why did Tomko offer to give Eric Young a beer after he kicked his rear end for a few minutes in their match? Why did James Storm come to the ring while Tomko was still in there? Can they at least wait until Tomko leaves the ring and we can digest what just happened.
If you have read any of my recent reports, I feel the same way about the Angle segments that I have for the last few months.
However, any complaints that I had with the Angle segments, the Thanksgiving vignettes, and the Christmas vignettes were so minimal compared to the Shark Boy on his death bed segments from this week. At least it was a way to get LAX and Chris Harris on the show.
When Shark Boy was going to be resuscitated by Velvet Sky and Angelina Love, was that Interspecies Erotica?
For the last few weeks, Scott Steiner has done everything possible to get the TNA Heavyweight Title Match even though he has the X Division title match, including stealing the case from Petey during a match. All it took was one sit down meeting with Jim Cornette to get a change of heart?
So Samoa Joe and Kevin Nash are at each other’s throats one week, but now they are BFFs?
I guess they can say that every day is Father’s Day in TNA after the James Mitchell/Abyss and BG James/Bob Armstrong segments.
While it is not really relevant to this show, if you compare the way the wrestlers were portrayed on this show, except Tomko, and the way they were portrayed on the Global Impact special; you would think that it was two different companies. Please consider a move closer to the way the wrestlers were portrayed in the Global Impact special.
Feel free to send feedback to richard@pwinsider.com
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