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By Josh Higham on 2021-04-06 13:29:00

There’s a new opening video package since I’ve last watched Dark Elevation. Nice way to make it feel like a real show. 

Dark Elevation is a daytime show this week.

We’re starting off with Hangman Page taking on Bill Collier. Collier has a bit of a height and size advantage, which he uses early. Page is able to reverse the dynamic and connect with the Buck Shot Lariat for the pinfall win. After the match, Page tosses a can of beer to his opponent. 

We head to the desk where Tony Schiavone and Paul Wight welcome us and run down the details of the Sydal Brothers taking on Scorpio Sky and Ethan Page. If you ever want to make a giant look average, put him in a chair behind a table and jack up the other dude’s chair. 

Hey, Youtube, a music video is not an ad. Skip. 

We’re back with Carlie Bravo and Dean Alexander representing the Nightmare Factory facing off with the Varsity Blonds. I see no one took my suggestion to keep Bravo together with Shawn Dean. That’s fine. I’m just one guy. Griff Garrison has a little trouble with his knee, but the Blonds still win with the powerbomb/missile dropkick. 

Dr. Britt Baker DMD has a mic before her match with Alex Gracia, calling Gracia the enhancement talent. Britt Baker DMD gets down into a Greco-Roman position and allows Gracia to grab the waistlock, but Baker immediately reverses and locks in the LockJaw. Gracia taps immediately as the Mandible claw.

Danny Limelight has a record over .500, which is a little surprising, but he’s taking on Dark Order’s 10. Limelight is connecting with kicks and strikes, while trying to focus on 10’s shoulder. Anytime 10 gets an advantage, it doesn’t last too long as Limelight fights out of a powerbomb attempt with a triangle sleeper. But 10 slips out and gets the win with full nelson. 

Big Swole faces Jazmin Allure. Swole locks in a Texas Cloverleaf, and Allure taps out before Swole can sit down deep. 

Dasha is with the Sydal Brothers asking about their mindset. Mike says he’s a Sydal, and they bend but don’t break. Matt says Sky is another phony, and he sees through Sky and Ethan Page’s partnership. 

Michael Nakazawa, billed as MT Nakazawa, is doing a parody of QT Marshall as he faces Vary Morales. Nakazawa uses Rick Knox as a shield and smashes Morales with the laptop to get the win. 

Lance Archer carries Baron Black into the ring, and somehow the match begins. Jake Roberts is on commentary. When asked about Sting, Jake Roberts says they’re smart enough to go to where the noise is. Archer toys with Baron Black too long and hits Black Out for the win. Jake Roberts has the mic after the replay and isn’t playing to the hard cam. Archer says it’s his time, but everyone else is scared. Archer says Sting inspired him and that Sting’s time is Archer’s time. 

Tesha Price gets an entrance this week out of the heel entrance and awaits her opponent, Ryo Mizunami. Paul Wight puts over Tesha Price’s potential throughout the match, but it’s not enough as a Mizunami spear gets the pinfall win. 

Colt Cabana is undefeated in 2021, but Max Caster raps that the Dark Order is more forced than Colt’s comedy and that he’ll cancel Colt like the podcast. Cabana goes to the back and grabs Evil Uno to negate Anthony Bowens’ presence at ringside. Cabana has his way with Caster, but Bowens is able to help block a monkey flip on Caster. Caster takes charges and focuses on Colt’s left shoulder. Cabana is able to power out of the London Dungeon. Bowens distracts the ref, tosses his chain to Evil Uno to distract her to the other side, and slides the boombox into the ring.e  A boombox to Cabana’s face gives Caster the win. 

The Hardy Family Office (Butcher, Blade, and Private Party) take on the makeshift quartet of Ryzin, D3, Adam Priest, and Fuego del Sol. Hardy’s men attack before the bell. To no one’s surprise, HFO wins, and Matt gets his 30%.

Time for Showcase where Paul Wight interviews John Silver. 

Matt Hardy takes on 5 from the Dark Order. No one from their respective teams stays ringside. Matt Hardy gets the win by submission.

Matt Hardy has the mic, and he is so angry about his money. He’s gonna take it out on the Dark Order one by one. But he also calls out Darby Allin for calling him a sell out. 

The new tag team of Scorpio Sky and Ethan Page arrive to take on the Sydal Brothers. Matt begins the match as Sky mocks Mike’s knee from last week’s attack. Sky and Page focus on Mike’s knee throughout the match. Sky takes out Matt, and Page hits Mike with Ego’s Edge to get the new team the win. 

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