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By Richard Trionfo on 2014-09-01 23:00:09
We are in Des Moines, Iowa and your announcers are John Layfield, Jerry Lawler, and Michael Cole.

We start off with Chris Jericho in the ring for the Highlight Reel.

Chris welcomes everyone to Raw is Jericho. Chris gives us a cheap pop for Des Moines. He says that this is a holiday for hard working men and women like yourself. His guest is someone who has never worked a day in his life. He has been given everything in the WWE on a silver platter.

Chris brings out Randy Orton, but instead of Randy, it is Triple H and he is joined by Seth Rollins, Kane, and Randy Orton and they are dressed like they are in an attorney commercial on ROH TV.

Chris says that he expected to see Randy come out tonight by himself and not with his law firm of Suck Up, Sell Out, and Schnozz.

Hunter tells Chris that he has never grown up, physically or literally. Hunter tells Chris that he has important business.

Chris says Hunter does not conduct important business in the ring unless his wife is being thrown in jail.

Hunter says that Chris should be thanking him instead of coming up with witty banter. Hunter comments on Chris’ scarf and Chris comments on Hunter’s pink tie. Hunter says that it is violet.

Hunter says that this is the most historic Highlight Reel in history. Hunter says that he reviewed the match at SummerSlam between John Cena and Brock Lesnar as well as the commentary about it. Hunter says that you can watch it on the WWE Network for $9.99.

Hunter says that it might not be best for business to have a rematch between Cena and Lesnar. Hunter says that he is contemplating a new number one contender.

Chris says that even though he is giving Cena his mandatory rematch, who will Hunter give the match to?

Randy says that there is only one person who can beat Brock Lesnar. He is a twelve time World Champion, a third generation wrestler, and someone who earned everything.

Kane suggests that it should be a masked man who can raise a demon to face the Beast Incarnate.

Seth says that maybe the future has already arrived in Mr. Money in the Bank himself. He did take out Dean Ambrose and he has become one of the most intelligent and most dangerous Superstars in the locker room.

Chris suggests that you give the shot to a six time champion and the first Undisputed Champion in the business.

John Cena’s music interrupts Chris’ catchphrases and John is serious.

John wants to know what the hell Hunter is talking about. Just because Flair and Shawn don’t think he can win doesn’t mean that he won’t. Those same two guys didn’t think he could beat Hunter at Wrestlemania 22, but Hunter tapped out. John tells Hunter he can watch it if he forgot. Hunter is running the company and he does not care how many times Hunter has seen the footage, John has invoked the rematch clause and Hunter has authorized it.

John says that if he takes it away, he will sue Hunter and take all of his money. Then he will be in control and the first thing he will do is tell Hunter he is fired. John says the rematch is happening. He will not just beat Brock Lesnar, he will beat Brock’s ass.

Hunter says wow. Is John going to sue? Now John is so desperate that he is threatening lawsuits? Maybe John is small minded like everyone else. He knows what his damn job is. He knows what being COO is. No matter what, he does what is best for business for the WWE every single day.

Hunter tells John that he is the first to admit that John as the WWE Champion is not what is best for business. John’s career ending at the hands of Brock Lesnar is not what is best for business.

Seth says let him have the rematch. What is the worst that can happen? If an opportunity presents itself, there is always Plan B.

Randy says Seth is right. Give him the rematch. Let me face the winner. Randy wants to know where his rematch is.

Chris says that this is still the Highlight Reel. Chris says that Randy has had 4,000 title matches since Wrestlemania and he has never succeeded. The last big match that Randy had, he was Superman punched and speared by Roman Reigns.

Randy says that meant nothing. Roman means nothing and if Roman was here, he would drop him like the piece of crap he is. Randy says that if Chris wants to make a joke of him, he will not like the punchline.

Roman Reigns’ music finally plays and he makes his way to the ring.

Roman tells Randy that he is here, so drop him. Just like he thought, Randy is all talk. Roman asks Kane and Seth if they are angry about breaking up the eulogy or maybe they are pissed about almost being destroyed by a cinder block. Roman says that he should be in the mix.

Hunter says that everyone seems like they can take on Brock Cena (sic) at Night of Champions. Everyone in the ring gets an opportunity to prove themselves. They will get a chance to stand tall. We will have a six man tag match. Chris Jericho, John Cena, and Roman Reigns will face Seth Rollins, Randy Orton, and Kane. Who can earn their spot? Who can prove it? Hunter says that he will be sitting at ringside and he will be watching.

Rollins tries to hit Reigns with the briefcase but he misses and Reigns punches Rollins. Rollins drops the briefcase and leaves the ring. Reigns with a chest pass of the briefcase to Cena.

Michael Cole talks about how much weight will be in the ring when Mark Henry and Big Show face Luke Harper and Erick Rowan (not that having Bray Wyatt and Roman Reigns with them on Smackdown in a six man tag match wasn’t more weight).

We see highlights of Sheamus defeating Damien Sandow.

Sheamus and Dolph Ziggler walk in the back as we go to commercial.

We are back with a look at Seth Rollins’ failed attempt to attack Roman Reigns with the briefcase.

Match Number One: Cesaro and Miz (with Damien Sandow and Make Up Artist [Sue II]) versus Sheamus and Cesaro

Ziggler and Cesaro start things off and they lock up. Cesaro with a kick and European uppercut followed by elbow drops to mock Ziggler. Ziggler with a drop kick and he goes after Miz on the apron, but Miz goes to the floor. Cesaro kicks Ziggler while Miz has make up applied. Cesaro with an arm bar. Cesaro pushes Ziggler into the corner and Miz tags in. Cesaro with a slam and Miz does some jazz hands before connecting with a boot to the head and he gets a near fall.

Miz with kicks to Ziggler. Ziggler with elbows and a punch but Miz misses a clothesline. Ziggler with a Thesz Press and hip toss. Miz goes to the floor. Sheamus tags in and he chases Miz around the ring and he punches Miz in the head while Miz covers up. Sheamus blocks a kick and he pushes Miz to the mat. Sheamus with a shoulder in the corner followed by a knee lift and a clothesline.

Miz with punches to Sheamus. Sheamus sends Miz to the apron and he connects with the forearms to the chest. Sheamus brings Miz into the ring and he hits a Finlay Slam for a near fall. Miz with a kick and punch. Sheamus blocks a hip toss and Miz covers up and Sheamus punches Miz. Cesaro tags in and he hits a drop kick and we go to commercial.

We are back and Cesaro with an elbow drop to Sheamus and he applies a reverse chin lock while Miz takes a breather at ringside. Cesaro with punches in the corner and he slaps Sheamus a few times. Sheamus punches Cesaro and Cesaro sends Sheamus to the apron. Sheamus with a shoulder and he goes for a slingshot shoulder but Cesaro with a forearm. Cesaro with a fallaway slam and bridge for a near fall.

Cesaro with an Irish whip and he runs into a boot in the corner. Sheamus pulls himself up to the turnbuckles but Cesaro with a forearm. Sheamus with a head butt and he hits a shoulder tackle and both men are down. Miz and Ziggler tag in and Ziggler with two clotheslines and a splash in the corner followed by a neck breaker. Miz counters a Fameasser attempt but Ziggler counters with a sunset flip for a near fall. Ziggler with a hesitation DDT for a near fall. Sheamus and Cesaro go over the top rope to the floor.

Ziggler misses the Fameasser and Miz leaves the ring and Sandow comes in to replace him. Ziggler hits the Zig Zag on Sandow but Miz with a Skull Crushing Finale for the three count.

Winners: Miz and Cesaro

It is time to talk about Brie Bella’s state of mind after what has happened since SummerSlam. We take a look at what happened last week on Raw.

It is time for the first ‘Growing Up Bella’ segment.

Nikki says that Brie was always conniving and jealous. Nikki shows a photo from her senior prom. She says that she was so excited and she bought the most expensive dress she can afford. Right after the photo was taken, Ryan disappeared. She found him later on that night in the parking lot . . . with Brie. Nikki says that she went home to cry her eyes out. She says that she has never told anyone before.

Match Number Two: Eva Marie, Rosa Mendes, and Cameron versus Layla El, Summer Rae, and Naomi

Layla with a rollup on Rosa for a near fall. Layla with a jackknife cover for a near fall. Layla with a rollup for a near fall followed by a series of kicks for a near fall. Layla with a springboard cross body but Cameron breaks up the cover. Layla hits Cameron from behind and then Eva and Cameron attack Layla. Summer and Naomi get in the ring and the referee calls for the bell.

No Contest

After the match, Naomi hits the Rear View on Cameron while Layla and Summer hit a double drop kick.

We take a look at the Seth Rollins and Kane Cinder Block Challenge over the last few weeks.

We go to commercial.

Match Number Three: Big Show and Mark Henry versus Erick Rowan and Luke Harper

Rowan and Henry start off and Rowan with a side head lock. Henry with a shoulder tackle and head butt. Henry with shoulders in the corner followed by an Irish whip. Henry punches Rowan in the corner. Henry with a splash in the corner and Rowan is down. Henry stands on Rowan’s chest and Harper tries to interfere. Henry chokes Rowan with his boot.

Henry kicks Rowan in the corner and stands on Rowan’s chest. Harper tries to interfere but Harper is knocked to the floor. Rowan pulls Henry off the ropes and Harper tags in and hits a clothesline for a near fall as we go to commercial.

We are back and Rowan with a front face lock on Henry. Both men try for boots and then Rowan backs Henry into the corner to tag in Harper. Harper punches Henry while Rusev and Lana make their way to the ramp. Harper runs into a boot from Henry.

Show tags in and he connects with two clotheslines followed by an Irish whip and running butt splash and shoulder tackle. Show with a thrust kick to Rowan and they all go to the floor. Show misses a shoulder tackle on the floor and Show hits the ringside barrier. Harper returns to the ring.

Show gets back in at nine and Harper with kicks to Show followed by a boot to the head for a near fall. Rowan tags in and Harper with a palm strike to the ribs. Rowan with a series of kicks Rowan with the double atomic noogie on Show. Show with a snap mare but Rowan with a boot to the head. Harper tags in and he connects with double palm thrusts to Show. Show with chops to Harper but Harper with a thrust kick.

Harper with a knee drop. Rowan tags in and he punches Show. Rowan gets a near fall. Rowan punches Show and Rowan with a slam and he gets a near fall. Rowan goes for a second slam but Show blocks it and Show with a DDT.

Henry and Harper tag in and Henry with clotheslines followed by an Irish whip and splash into the corner. Henry with a running power slam for a near fall but Rowan breaks up the cover. Show sends Rowan over the top rope to the floor and Show follows. Rowan sends Show into the announce table. Henry gets Harper up for the World’s Strongest Slam but Rusev comes into the ring and hits a jumping thrust kick and the referee calls for the bell.

Winners: Mark Henry and Big Show (by disqualification)

After the match, Harper tries to hit Show with a chair but Show punches the chair. Rowan has a chair and he decides not to enter the ring.

We go to another segment of Growing Up Bella.

Nikki says that Brie has always been jealous, conniving, and self centered. Nikki passed her driver’s test but Brie failed. They got a car from their mom. Since Brie couldn’t drive, Nikki drove Brie everywhere. One night, Brie stole the car. Nikki says that Brie also stole her driver’s license. Brie got into an accident and totaled the car. Brie gave the officer Nikki’s driver’s license. Nikki says that she never told anyone.

We are back and Michael Sam has been invited to Raw next week.

We take a look at a video package for the John Cena and Brock Lesnar rematch.

Paul Heyman makes his way to the stage and he introduces himself. He reminds us that he is the advocate for the current reigning undisputed WWE Champion, Brock Lesnar. His client has authorized him to discuss over compensatory behavior. Paul says that is what has been exhibited by your hero John Cena ever since he was defeated in the most one sided, lopsided WWE Title match in history by his client Brock Lesnar.

Paul says that what he is about to say is not conjecture, it is historical fact. Paul says that Brock beat, victimized, and conquered John Cena at SummerSlam. We need to add that Brock emasculated John Cena at SummerSlam. As any great champion before him, John Cena has suffered the fate of the date when he was stripped of his manhood. When that happens, you stop listening to reason. Last week, John did not listen to the panel. Tonight, he did not listen to Triple H. Triple H sees John as a cash cow. A cash cow that will be milked for the last time by Brock Lesnar.

John Cena is so desperate to hold on to the image that he is viable. That is why he went through the Wyatts. That is why John will be in the main event tonight. You can stack that entire locker room and multiply it by infinity, you will not match half the brutality that John Cena will be subjected to by his client . . . the beast . . . the Champion of the World . . . Brock Lesnar.

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