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Your announcers are Rich Brennan, Byron Saxton and JBL. Michael Cole gets the night off, probably to do the Insanity workout. The guy is shredded. Way to go Shoelace. Anyway, it gives Brennan a chance to call a PPV type event.
The show opened with Randy Orton and Dolph Ziggler vs. Rusev and Sheamus. Orton got, by far, the biggest pop coming out.
If you guessed, “The match started off with Dolph taking a lot of abuse until he made the hot take to Randy, who cleaned house” you win the Booby prize! Then Sheamus came back for a second, thought he had the Brogue on Orton, but he of course missed it. Instead, he ate a Superkick from Ziggler and an RKO from Dolph. The babyfaced win. Fine for what it was.
After the match, Rusev got on the mic and called Sheamus a stupid American. Uh, no, he’s Irish. Anyway, he went into the ring and called Sheamus more useless than Lana, more useless than these people. Rusev told him to take a hike. Sheamus feigned doing it and when Rusev turned around, he nailed him with a Brogue. He then got on the mic and told Rusev to Kiss His Arse. Then he made love to Summer Rae in the ring. OK, he didn’t, I was just seeing if you were paying attention.
After they recapped Crazy Kane from Monday, we say Crazy Kane today. He goes from being mad to happy Kane. He is on crutches but he couldn’t miss this. Kane promised Seth he would make sure to come running if Abyss, er the demon, shows up.
Next up is Neville vs. Stardust.
Cody was in control a lot of the way early, with the match building Neville coming back and hitting his big spots, like an Asai moonsault on Stardust mid way through. Neville wanted to hit the Red Arrow but Cody sniffed it out and went back on the offensive. Oh yeah, and Stardust was way too interested in Neville’s cape because, well, Cody is a freak and all. … Cody put on the cape and come off of the top wearing it but got slugged in the gut. Neville then set up for the Red Arrow. He hit it. 1-2-3. Solid match.
After the match Neville put on the cape and preened for the crowd.
Paul Heyman was then Renee’s guest. Heyman got a huge pop. The crowd even did his “My name is Paul Heyman” with him. He then put over his NY brethren and Madison Square Garden. Mike Johnson could be heard yelling “Damn RIGHT!” by me all the way out here in Las Vegas. OK, I may have made that up. Or did I? Anyway, Paul said this ain’t gonna be a great night for The Big Show.
OK, this is weird. When Paige came out, she was announced as from Team PCB. I am so confused. I am even more so that she is teaming with Becky Lynch and Charlotte against The Bella team. I guess a turn isn’t what it used to be. This would be a great time to show what the Divas Revolution can do. Too bad that Sasha Banks isn’t on the other side from PCB.
The announcers sell early that their is strife in PCB. God, why do they do that? When someone screws you twice, they are a problem. Anyway, PCB was in control early when the fans chanted “We Want Sasha”. I was not alone but sorry NYC, Vince likes the Twin Magic. And almost as soon as they chanted that, Team Bella took control and went to work on Becky.
Becky came back and tagged in Charlotte but, and this will shock you, Paige tagged herself in!!!!! Who would have seen that coming, beyond everyone? Charlotte was going for the Figure 8 and was like WTF?? Paige was legal though she got to stay in, and the Bellas used the distraction to take control. After getting beat on for a minute or two, Paige made a comeback. She made her way to the corner and as she went for the tag, Becky and Charlotte jumped off of the apron, screwing her! Nikki then hit The Can Slam on her and Team Bella won.
Afterward, Paige took the mic and said she couldn’t believe her teammates would do that to her. I am a great friend. She would never ever do that to them. She doesn’t know if she can forgive them.
Now, on the one hand, teaming Paige with her old partners only to get screwed is what they do on house shows. But this isn’t an ordinary house show so it just came off really stupid.
Please click to Page Two for more thoughts from tonight's show
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