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COMPLETE IMPACT WRESTLING REPORT: THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE REUNITE, THE FINAL EXPERIMENT IS SET FOR NEXT WEEK, THE SECRET INVESTOR IS REVEALED, AND MORE

By Stuart Carapola on 2014-01-30 22:50:44
Welcome to the Impact Wrestling Report here on PWInsider.com!

We start the show with a look back at last week when Brutus Magnus apparently ended the TNA career of Sting, then we go to the locker room where, earlier tonight, Kurt Angle got into a backstage scuffle with Magnus and his cronies, and they had to be pulled apart by TNA officials.

We go to the ring where Magnus, Spud, and Ethan Carter III are greeted with a loud round of boos by the crowd in Glasgow, Scotland. He starts to speak, then remembers that he's in Scotland and starts speaking slowly for their benefit. He reminds us that Sting has fallen to the Reign of Magnus just like Jeff Hardy and AJ Styles, and he says that Sting had a hell of a run, but he ended Sting just like he said he would. He says there's a word that the locals should know very well because it happens when the dead weight is dropped, and it's called "thinning the herd". He and Dixie Carter have decided to rid TNA of the dinosaurs who have been drifting around, put them out to pasture, and make way for the new stars of the business like the Bromans, Zema Ion, Rockstar Spud, and Magnus. EC3 gives Magnus a dirty look at that, but Magnus doesn't notice that while he talks about all the people he's singlehandedly eliminated from this business. EC3 takes issue with that and starts to cut a promo on Magnus, but Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe come out to the ring and chase Magnus and his crew out. Angle says they came out here for one reason, and that's to avenge the screwing of the herd. Saying goodbye to Sting last week was the worst thing he's done in all the years he's been in TNA, and Sting was right: Magnus will go down in history as nothing but a paper champion. Magnus tells Angle to watch his mouth before he says something he regrets, and the crowd chants "paper champion" at Magnus as Angle says the only thing he regrets is letting him into the Main Event Mafia because they thought he could be somebody. Magnus says he is somebody because he's the World Champion and neither of them are, but Joe says their patience has run out and they came to Glasgow to kick some ass. Magnus says it sounds like they came here to fight, so he challenges Angle and Joe to face EC3 and himself later in the evening, but if they win, both of them are gone from TNA for good. Joe says they'll agree to that on one condition: if one of them pin or beat him unconscious, that guy gets a World Title shot. Magnus tells Joe we're on, and it looks like we have our main event!

Wait a minute, no we don't. Dixie Carter comes out to tell us that the match is not happening tonight, and Magnus isn't happy with that, but Dixie says there's a lot going on and she doesn't want to worry about this as well. The new investor is on his way here right now, and we can't take the chance on Magnus losing the title to Joe or Kurt. The crowd continues to inform Magnus that he's a paper champion, so Magnus tells them they have a deal and he'll see them in the ring later on tonight.

The Wolves show up at the arena and promise that we'll find out who the investor is later on tonight, and anyone who wants to talk to him before then will have to go through them.

Time for our opening match!

The Beautiful People vs Gail Kim & Lei'D Tapa

Gail and Tapa attack Velvet and Madison from behind before the bell even rings, and Gail proceeds to beat the crap out of Madison before tossing her across the ring into the clutches of Tapa, who proceeds to choke Madison. This is the first time Madison and Velvet have teamed up in over three years, and they quickly turn the tide as Madison avoids a charge by Gail and tags in Velvet, who goes to town on Gail with kicks and a bulldog for 2. Velvet goes for In Your Face, Tapa comes in to stop her, but the Beautiful People take her out and Velvet hits Gail with In Your Face for the win.

Winners: The Beautiful People

Chris Sabin comes storming out and tells Madison to take a hike so he can have a word with his girlfriend, then he proceeds to yell at Velvet for not returning his calls and tweets. She's still his girlfriend and she's supposed to support him, not cost him championships. He doesn't know what's going on with her, but he's willing to give her one chance right here and now to apologize to him so they can put it all behind them, then they can go in the back and she can give him a massage and they can move on. Velvet says that she only has one thing to say to Sabin: WE'RE DONE! Velvet walks off as Sabin goes nuts in the ring.

Joe and Angle are backstage talking strategy, and they say that they're not going down like Sting and AJ, and they burst into Bobby Roode's locker room. Angle says it's just the person he wanted to see, and he and Joe proceed to pound the snot out of Roode as we go to commercial.

We come back to Joe pulling Angle off of Roode, and Angle says he doesn't want Roode to take them out like he did to AJ and Sting, and Roode says he's taken Angle out before and he'd do it again, but even he can't take both Angle and Joe out by himself. Joe chokes Roode out and says the only reason he doesn't end Roode right now is because he wants Roode to see how this feels, and to think about it. Joe and Angle leave, and Roode smiles after them as they go.

James Storm comes out to the ring and says he and Gunner were friends long before he even came to TNA, but somewhere along the way, things fell apart, so he wants Gunner to come out so they can put an end to this right now. Gunner and hit briefcase come out to tell Storm that they both came to TNA to be great, do great things, and be remembered, and he felt like they did that as a team and as friends. But once he got the briefcase, things blew up, and he's not sure what happened along the way, but he had to make a career decision that would affect him and his family. He knows what kind of man Storm is, they're friends, but Storm would have done the same thing for his own son and daughter. He knows Gunner's story about his time in the military and how he got the name Gunner for a reason, and his time in the Marines taught him that he's not fighting for the government, he's fighting for the man beside him. That actually got the Scottish fans to start a USA chant, and Gunner says some of his friends died there and didn't come home, but he did the same thing for Storm: he fought with them and beside them. Storm knows Gunner was a great Marine and he knows what kind of man he is, and he's not the kind of guy to take credit, but he should start to because he's a hell of a wrestler. He's just a redneck who likes to ride his tractor and drink beer, but the most important thing to him is his kids, and when his daughter asked him why he's mad at Gunner, Storm realized he's been selfish. He tells Gunner that he's proud of him and he has his back, and he wants to shake Gunner's hand and tell him he's sorry.

Gunner shakes his hand and they have a nice moment, but Bad Influence comes out and Kazarian asks if we expect those monkey farts to believe a word that just came out of his mouth. The only thing worse than a drunk, dime store cowboy is a lying drunk, dime store cowboy. He knows Gunner is all beard and no brains, but he knows that Storm desires beer, ugly fat women, and above all else, the TNA World Title. Daniels says that since they're the smartest men in the room, he has an idea: Bad Influence takes on Gunner and Storm, and if Bad Influence wins the match, one of them gets his title shot. The four men start brawling, and the bell rings...as we go to commercial!

Gunner & James Storm vs Bad Influence

We're back, and Storm and Gunner are taking turns working Kazarian over, but Daniels sneaks in with a cheapshot on Gunner and they turn the tide. They hit a series of double teams and get some near falls on Gunner, but Gunner fights his way free and goes for the tag. Daniels distracts Storm and keep him from tagging in, and the assault on Gunner continues. Gunner backdrops out of Angel's Wings and tags in Storm, who goes to town on Daniels with a series of punches, a leaping enziguiri, and a top rope bodypress for 2. Kazarian saves Daniels from the Eye of the Storm and nails Storm with a missiledropkick, but Gunner tags in and runs right over Kazarian with overwhelming power moves. Gunner with a slingshot suplex and then he goes to the top rope, Daniels tries to nail Gunner again, but Storm knocks Daniels out with the Last Call, then Gunner comes off the top rope with a swandive headbutt on Kazarian for the win.

Winners: James Storm & Gunner

Storm hands Gunner his briefcase and raises his hand. Good match.

Dixie Carter is backstage stressing out over whoever the mystery investor is, and she sends Spud to find out who it is right now.

We see a video package looking back at the history of Samoa Joe in TNA, and he'll put his TNA career on the line later on tonight!

Dixie Carter is on the phone yelling at her attorney when Bobby Roode walks in holding his neck. Dixie says she doesn't have a lot of time if he doesn't have info on this investor, and Roode says he wants a shot at the TNA World Title in the main event of Lockdown. He did what she asked with both AJ Styles and Sting, and he doesn't give a damn what's on her plate because they had a deal. Dixie goes for her wallet, and Roode says he doesn't want her money and that he'll give her one week to figure it out, and until that happens, he's not doing any more favors for her.

Eric Young is backstage raving about how awesome it will be to get a shot at the tag title with Abyss, and ODB wants to know if this is a good idea and that she's worried about him because they call Abyss the monster for a reason. Abyss walks in and EY asks him if he's ready, and Abyss holds up the bag of thumbtacks and walks off. EY smiles and follows him off screen.

Spud is backstage and he's going to get answers from the Wolves right now in the ring.

Spud comes out to the ring, busts on the Scots in the crowd, and says he wants answers about this secret investor, and calls the Wolves out to the ring to get to the bottom of this. He asks who the investors are, but they're not talking, so he takes his coat off and reminds them who he is. He says they may be the best tag team in the world, but he's Dixie Carter's Chief of Staff, he pushed Jeff Hardy off a steel ladder, beat Samoa Joe within an inch of his life, and Ethan Carter III told him he's a lion and a tiger, and orders them to alk. He slaps Davey Richards in his face, and Eddie smiles and shakes his head as the crowd goes "OHHHHHHHHHH!" The Wolves take their jackets off and roll up their sleeves, then beat the snot out of Spud and give him the pop-up Alarm Clock. Eddie tells Spud to go tell Dixie that she'll find out the identity of the investor at the same time as everybody else later tonight. The investor did send them out here with a message: they're very interested in tonight's tag team main event, and if anyone interferes in that match, they will be fired.

We see a video package looking back at the history of Eric Young dragging Abyss back out of Joseph Park, and they'll challenge for the TNA World Tag Team Title...NEXT!

TNA World Tag Team Title Match: The Bromans vs Eric Young & Abyss

The X Division Title Match graphic flashes before the match for some reason, and Young dominates Jessie to start the match, completely outwrestling him and getting a 2 count off a belly to belly suplex. Abyss comes in and chokes Jessie, and Young has to drag him off of Jessie and opens himself up to a cheapshot. Now EY is caught in the wrong part of town and takes a good stomping from the Bromans, but he breaks free before too long and tags in Abyss, who cleans house on the champs and also Zema Ion when he tries to interject himself. the referee stops Abyss from ending Ion, so Abyss picks the referee up and, despite Eric Young's pleas to put him down, hits the referee with Shock Treatment. EY goes to check on the referee, but turns around and gets chokeslammed by Abyss. Abyss walks off to the boos of the fans, but Young gets a microphone and asks his "friend" if this is it. If this is how Abyss wants it, there's only one experiment left, and if Abyss wants to get crazy, EY invented crazy. Eric Young challenges Abyss to face him next week, one-on-one, in Monster's Ball. Abyss smiles and tells Young that he's going to hurt him, then nods his head in agreement. Well, I guess we can call this...

NO CONTEST

The Mystery Cameraman finds the Wolves out in the parking lot and, as Davey is in the van talking with the investor, Eddie tells the cameraman to back off unless he wants to wind up like Spud.

Bully Ray is backstage pushing a casket around. We'll find out what he's up to...NEXT!

We go to video of Samuel Shaw's latest date with Christy Hemme. He has her back to his place and shows her around. He's acting super creepy, but since she's oblivious, she doesn't think anything of him burning his hand on a candle and no-selling it, stealing her hair tie thingy, smelling it, then kicking her out of a dark room he says she doesn't need to see. He sends her to go pour some wine, then he turns on the lights and, sure enough, it's a Christy shrine. He puts the hair tie on a poster of her he put hair on, kisses it, and walks out to join her.

Bully Ray comes out to the ring with his casket and says he used to be the President of Aces & Eights, he used to be the World Champion, but one man took both those things away from him: Ken Anderson. He keeps slapping Anderson down and Anderson keeps coming back, so Bubba is going to challenge him to one last match: no pinfall, no countout, no DQ, the only way to win is to put your opponent in the casket. Anderson comes out to the ring and goes face to face with Bubba right over the casket and asks him what he thinks he'll do once Anderson is in the casket, and Bubba says he'll piledrive his wife and kids. Anderson asks if he thinks he's going to do that, and Bubba says he'd love to piledrive his wife. Ha. Anderson says everyone is sick of Bubba running his mouth, so he's going to do everyone a favor and shut his mouth, and by the way, his wife and kids say hi. Anderson slams the casket lid open into Bubba's face and proceeds to lay a beating on him, and they make their way into the ring where Bubba goes to the second rope, gets punched in the ding ding, and Anderson gives him a Finlay roll onto a chair. Anderson then starts destroying Bubba with the chair, but Bubba heads for the hills before Anderson can finish him off.

We see a video package looking at Kurt Angle and how he's a cyborg who is unbreakable and unrelenting.

Magnus and EC3 are backstage getting ready for the main event, and Magnus says EC3 is all muscles and he's the brain, and he knows EC3 doesn't like him, but that's okay because even though he'd rather not have a green rookie as his partner, he's the champ and he'll bring it home. EC3 says it sounds like Magnus is setting up his excuses and the only thing green is the moeny EC3's family gives Magnus, but before they can get too much further into this, Dixie comes in and asks them how it's going and they're suddenly all smiles. Dixie tells them not to let her down, and they'll be in the main event...NEXT!

IT'S MAIN EVENT TIME!

Samoa Joe & Kurt Angle vs Brutus Magnus & Ethan Carter III

Angle and EC3 start, and Angle completely dominates Carter before tagging Joe in to dish out some of his own punishment to the boss' nephew. Angle tags in and gets caught by Carter, who tags out to Magnus as we go out to the parking lot where the Wolves are getting out of the investor's limo. They make the cameraman pan down to the ground where we only see the investor's feet hitting the ground and walking off. We're at commercial.

We're back, and Angle is still in the wrong corner getting double teamed by EC3 and Magnus. Angle finally dodges a charge from Carter, dumps him on his head with a German suplex, and tags out to Samoa Joe. Joe comes in and DESTROYS Magnus, pummeling him with one big move after another before catching Magnus with a snap powerslam and a cross armbreaker. EC3 nails Joe, but Angle drags him out to the floor and suplexes him onto the thin floor mats. Joe ducks the Marufuji clothesline and gets the Kokina Clutch, and Magnus tries to fight it, but eventually is forced to tap out.

Winners: Samoa Joe & Kurt Angle

Joe is now the #1 contender to the TNA World Title, and Dixie Carter comes down the ramp with Spud in tow, and tells Magnus she knew this could happen. The crowd tells Magnus that Joe is gonna kill him as Joe tells Magnus that the odds have caught up with him, and not only are he and Angle going to stay in TNA for a long, long time, but he's the #1 contender for the World Title. He tells Magnus not to blame this on EC3 because he's the one who tapped out. The fans chant "you tapped out" at Magnus as Joe tells him to shine his belt up because Joe is gonna kill him.

Now Angle has the mic and he says it's nights like these that make him proud to be in this business, and he thanks Glasgow for making the pain go away, and he says that he's been here for eight years, and now that he's beaten Bobby Roode in a cage, he's glad to say that Kurt Angle is back. He tells Dixie to bring her checkbook because it's time for Kurt Angle to be inducted into the TNA Hall of Fame. He tells Dixie to invite the new investor because this is real, it's damn real, but Dixie isn't having it, and she demands the investor, whoever he or she is, to show their face right now. The Wolves come out to the top of the ramp as the investor's music hits, and out comes...MVP! Wait, we didn't hear it from him first!

Thanks for reading the Impact Wrestling Report here on PWInsider.com, I'll be back tomorrow to discuss Impact and more with Dave Scherer on the Stu & Pid Show!

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