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We kick the show off with a video package looking at the coronation of Magnus as TNA World Champion and the beginning of a new era.
Kurt Angle comes out to the ring and tells us that his name is Kurt Angle, and 2013 was the worst year of his life, from his feud to Aces & Eights to his personal issues that kept him out of the ring. He turned down the Hall of Fame induction to prove that he can earn it all back again, and people call him a cyborg, but he's not that anymore and he's here to talk about his plans for 2014. Bobby Roode comes out to interrupt and asks if this is really what we're about to witness, and if Angle is really going to walk away and leave Impact Wrestling like Jeff Hardy did last week? Did Angle finally come to the realization, after losing to him over and over, that he just doesn't have what it takes anymore? Roode asks him a favor and says that if he's going to walk away, to look him in the eyes and tell him face to face that Bobby Roode is better than him. Angle tells Roode that he's not leaving, he's here to make it clear that Kurt Angle is going to kick ass in 2014, which is why he's challenging Roode to one more match. Roode can't believe what he's hearing and tells Angle absolutely not because he has nothing left to prove to the fans or to Angle. He's proven that he can beat him time after time, that he's better than him, and that Angle isn't Hall of Fame worthy, and that they are done. Roode turns to leave, then thinks better about it and says that he might accept the challenge, if Angle agrees that WHEN Roode beats him, he leaves and never accepts a Hall of Fame induction in TNA. Angle says he's glad he accepts, and he will face him at Genesis, and Angle has a stipulation of his own: the match will take place in a steel cage! Roode says that if Angle wants Roode in a cage, he's on. They do a staredown, Roode turns to leave, tries to suckerpunch Angle, and they start trading blows while the usual crew comes out to separate them. Spud comes out to lay down the law and gets knocked on his butt, so he gets a mic and says this is Madam Dixie Carter's night, so if they want to fight so bad, they can get partners and go at it in a tag match later tonight.
Speaking of Dixied Carter, she's backstage saying that tonight is her crowning moment because it took her eleven long years to find the perfect champion, and Magnus is going to get his coronation tonight. The director yells cut and Dixie goes inside to get a message from a courier that just says "see you tonight" without a signature. She seems perturbed.
We come back from commercial and Dixie Carter is backstage ordering Spud to find out who sent the message in case it's a threat to her.
We go to the ring for the first Gail Kim Open Challenge of 2014! She hopes she gets some real competition since everyone she's faced has been very unimpressive.
Gail Kim vs Madison Rayne
Kinda saw this coming, but okay. Madison catches Gail with a crossbody right from the bell and proceeds to stomp Gail's face in before spearing her and then ramming the back of her head into the mat over and over. Gail finally takes Madison down with a hair yank, cracks her with a kneelift, then gets on top of Madison and pummels her with forearms. Madison reverses a backdrop attempt to a snap suplex and a rolling neckbreaker, then does COME ON! as the fans tell her she's still got it. Lei'D Tapa grabs Madison's ankle and yanks her out to the floor, then Gail drags her back in and covers for 2. Gail gets a surfboard into a dragon sleeper, but Madison won't tap out, so Gail turns it into a chinlock instead as Madison slips out of the hold. Gail sends Madison into the corner and goes for Eat DaFeet, Madison reverses to a backslide for 2, then they wipe each other out with a double clothesline. Mike Tenay tries to convince us that Jeff Hardy really quit as Madison starts making a comeback, but Madison goes for a victory roll and gets dropped hard on her face. Gail puts the mouth on her (not in the way people would pay to see), goes for Eat DaFeet again, but Madison counters to a grapevine cradle for 3.
Winner: Madison Rayne
Nice finish, but we go backstage to Madison's former partner Velvet Sky putting her lipstick on. Chris Sabin comes in and she starts to talk, but he tells her to zip it because either he's walking out with his X Division Title, or he's walking out without her. She still acts like she cares, which is very cute.
Kurt Angle is backstage telling Gunner that he's turning it around in 2014, and since Gunner has that briefcase, it looks like he'll be World Champion real soon, and that's why he wants him to be his partner tonight. Gunner says it would be an honor, but James Storm comes in, scoffs at Gunner, and leaves.
X Division Title Match: Austin Aries vs Chris Sabin
The smartass fans chant that Shelley's better as they tie up and feel each other out. Sabin backs off and makes Velvet come up on the apron and give him a kiss, and Aries uses the opening to drill Sabin with the IED and cover for 2. Sabin blocks a brainbuster, but Aries drills him with a clothesline and gets him in the Last Chancery. Sabin begs for Velvet to get on the apron, but Velvet refuses, so Sabin gets out of the hold and goes to yell at her. Aries yanks Sabin back into the ring and hits the pump action elbowdrop for 2. Aries with a stump puller, turns it into a pinning combination for 2, then hits a series of quick moves and a Lionsault for 2. Sabin finally dumps Aries with a back suplex and puts the boots to him, then hangs Aries in the Tree of Woe and chokes him with his boot. Aries sits up and nails Sabin with an Ace Crusher out of the corner, then hammers him with a roaring elbow that sends him out to the floor. Aries comes off the top with a big double axhandle, then dumps Sabin back inside and heads to the top rope. The crowd is solidly behind Aries as he connects with a missile dropkick, and Sabin orders Velvet to get on the apron and distract Aries, who tells her to get down before he gets hurt. Sabin kicks Aries low while the referee has his back turned and small packages him for the win.
Winner and NEW X Division Champion: Chris Sabin
Velvet looks disappointed in herself as Sabin grabs her by the wrist and drags her to the ramp, where Jeremy Borash congratulates him on regaining the title. Sabin says he wants to thank the one person he couldn't have done it without...himself! He thanks himself profusely, then continues dragging Velvet up the ramp.
Spud is backstage preparing his introduction of Magnus later on tonight, and his cell phone rings and uses Dixie Carter's entrance music as the ringtone. It's the sixth hangup call today, and he notes the area code (which I assume is wherever AJ lives), and tells someone to get him a tea.
Samuel Shaw vs Norv Fernum
Sam seems preoccupied with Christy as he comes out to the ring, then holds the ropes open so she can step down to the floor before announcing his opponent. Shaw knocks Fernum on his butt with one shot, then whips him hard into the corner as Christy smirks at ringside. Fernum uses his speed to evade Shaw for a bit, but Shaw snaps him over with a powerslam, stops to look down at Christy, and gets the over the back neckbreaker. Fernum tries to drag himself up on Shaw's clothes, and Shaw chokes Fernum out with a head and arm choke.
Winner: Samuel Shaw
Shaw walks over to Christy to stare at her, then walks off as Christy looks uncomfortable.
The mystery cameraman asks James Storm what he thinks of Gunner teaming with Kurt Angle, and Storm says he made his name as a tag team specialist in this company, and all his partners ended up changing. He's not surprised by what Gunner did, but he's going to show Angle that he made a mistake. He goes into a dressing room backstage and tells the occupant that he's just who he was looking for, and we go to commercial.
We're back from commercial, and Roode is in his dressing room asking James Storm why he should take him as his partner tonight. Roode says he doesn't need Storm as his partner, but Storm says he's going to be out there one way or another, either as Roode's partner, or kicking everyone's ass.
We take another look back at the Rise of Magnus, then we're off to the ring for our featured tag match! Jeremy Borash catches Gunner on his way to the ring and asks what happens if Roode chose Storm as his partner, and Gunner says that if that happens, things will get real dangerous and physical.
Kurt Angle & Gunner vs Bobby Roode & James Storm
Wow, this came outta nowhere! The crowd chants for Beer Money as Angle and Storm go at it, with Angle catching Storm with a back elbow and a snap suplex. Gunner tags in and promptly gets nailed with a high knee, then gets tagged by Roode from the apron. Roode comes in and gets destroyed by Gunner, and he tries to ram Gunner's head into the turnbuckle, but Gunner no-sells, ramms his own head into the buckle, and slams into Roode with a charging clothesline and a slingshot suplex for 2. Guner gets in Storm's face and turns his back on Roode long enough to allow him to recover and hit a spinebuster. Storm tags himself in and covers Gunner for 1, then ground and pounds Gunner. Roode and Storm work together to nail Gunner with a double back elbow, then they tag in and out while ramming shoulderblocks to Gunner's ribs. They continue with double team beatdowns on Gunner, who tries in vain to break free before getting beaten back down by the former TNA World Tag Team Champions. Beer Money hits a double suplex as the fans chant their name again, and Gunner and Storm wipe each other out with a double clothesline. Roode distracts the referee and makes him miss Gunner making the tag, he tries to keep Angle out but Angle tears through Storm and Roode anyway. Angle gets Storm in the anklelock, Roode nails him from behind, Gunner gets Roode in the Gun Rack, Storm nails Gunner with the Last Call, and Roode hits the AA for the win.
Winners: Beer Money
Angle goes after Roode after the bell and Roode bails out, and Angle yells at him up the ramp as Storm takes the briefcase and dumps it on Gunner's chest before walking off.
Sting is backstage, and he's...WALKING! Spud runs up and asks if he sent the mystery message to Madame Dixie, and Sting says he's here to talk to Dixie, not her lap dog, and tells him to get out of his face.
We look back at last week when Ethan Carter III pinned Sting to win the main event tag match before Jeff Hardy quit. EC3 says that he had a great 2013, and while people said he's had inferior competition, he pinned Sting as easy as E...C...3. He sent Hardy packing, but wants to fight him like a man and challenges him to a match tonight. Jeff's music plays, but of course he doesn't come out, so EC3 says to ring th bell and starts counting Hardy out, but Sting comes out and berates him, saying he's hiding behind Dixie. EC3 says he beat Sting and he's done with him, but Sting accuses him of being Dixie's lap dog, a chant the fans pick up on. Carter says that he knows what Sting's doing and won't fall for it, and he starts to leave, but Sting says he guesses it's true about him being Dixie's lap dog. That does it for EC3, who says he will fight Sting one-on-one. Sting drops his mic and begins undoing his shirt to fight, but EC3 finishes and says that match will happen in two weeks at Genesis.
Joseph Park is backstage telling Eric Young that he doesn't know about this Abyss stuff and doesn't remember what happened last week. He doesn't know why EY put him in this match, and EY says to trust him, and he was there to help him in Monster's Ball last week, but this time he's got to do it alone. EY leaves, and Bully Ray comes out and reads some of his poetry, then says not to burn for the sins of Ken Anderson. Park asks him what he's talking about, and Bubba takes his sunglasses off and says he's going to set him on fire.
Bully Ray vs Joseph Park
This is Bubba's first match since the end of Aces & Eights, and he just stands in his corner with his sunglasses and hood on as Park dares him to come out and fight. Park doesn't look sure what to do, but bubba finally looks up as Park approaches him, and kicks him in the ding ding. Well, that's a DQ.
Winner: Joseph Park by DQ
Bubba pulls out a bottle of lighter fluid and starts spraying it all over Park, who rolls around on the mat holding his eyes where Bubba apparently sprayed him. Bubba takes out a lighter and holds it over Park, but Ken Anderson runs out to make the save and gets sprayed with lighter fluid as well. Anderson goes after Bubba, but Bubba holds the lighter up and stops Anderson dead in his tracks. Bubba goes out to the floor and walks off as Anderson stares after him.
Dixie and Ethan Carter are backstage with Spud, and they're...PRANCING! Magnus' coronation is up next!
Spud is out with Ethan Carter III to introduce a ceremony he says will top even the wedding of William and Kate, and proclaims Dixie the Queen of Dixieland, a place where dreams come true. But tonight, it's not about Dixie, it's about a man who will change the face of professional wrestling, our World Champion, a real British man, MAGNUS! Spud turns this over to the Master of Cermonies, EC3. Carter says Spud comes from a place where people worship a king and queen, but here in America, we worship the 1%, and last week, he beat Sting clean in the middle of the ring. But what is most important of all is that he's a Carter, and the world needs them, but the true man of the hour is Magnus, because he became the World Heavyweight Champion and now rules the world. But behind every great man is a woman, a queen, his Aunt Dee, and here comes Dixie Carter. Dixie appreciates the warm reception, and she's here to tell one of her favorite stories about being on a flight to New York City and reading a magazine with an article about AJ Styles, then she turned the page and saw a six page feature on an aspiring wrestler who was already a massive superstar on TV in England, and he didn't just have it, he had all of it, and she knew right away that she would sign him to her roster. Five years later, he's overcome every challenge to become the best there is today, and he did it all on his own. Now she wants everyone to stand up, get off their lazy bums, and welcome her new World Champion, Magnus! Magnus comes out to a mixed reaction, sits in the throne they had set up for him in the ring, and he tells us to return our women to their full upright unlocked positions so everyone can listen to him. He thanks Spud and EC3 for their kind words, and special thanks to the one and only Miss Dixie Carter, who truly is the wind beneath his massive wings. He stands before us as the champion of the world, and he has mixed emotions because he's honored and humbled at the same time because he knows the fans thought it would be Bobby Roode, Kurt Angle, or Jeff Hardy standing here with the title today, but it's not because it's him! Everyone doubted him, and when people ask him why he turned his backs on the fans, he says they turned their backs on him, so from here on in, he'll never take a back seat to anybody in the business again, and he intends to be our World Champion for a very, very long time to come. Suddenly, Gunner's music hits and he comes out with the briefcase! We're at commercial!
We're back as Gunner gets in the ring to tell Magnus that history has been made, but his history begins tonight because he's ready to fight and he wants to cash in his briefcase for his title match right now. Dixie says it's not going to happen now, but Gunner clears out Spud and EC3 before going after Magnus. He gets Magnus up for the Gun Rack, but EC3 and Spud jump Gunner and hold him for Magnus, who gets ready to nail Gunner with the belt until AJ Styles runs out of the crowd and clears both EC3 and Spud out before going face to face with Gunner. They hold their belts up at each other then AJ lays his belt in front of him to draw a line and dares Magnus to fight him, but Magnus backs off and heads up the ramp as Dixie says this isn't going to happen. AJ tells Dixie that if he wants her intellectual property back, that he's got it right here, and instead of having her lawyers chase him all over the world, he's ready to fight right now. AJ isn't here because Dixie wanted him to, it's because she screwed the people over by making her World Champion a farce, and he needed to come back here. He tells Magnus that's right, he's a farce and everyone knows it, and he doesn't care if Magnus is wearing a belt, he's not a World Champion until he beats THE World Champion. Magnus asks AJ if he's challenging him, and AJ says there can only be one TNA World Champion. Dixie tells Magnus not to do it, but AJ asks Magnus if he's going to let Dixie drag him around by the nose, because if Magnus wants to prove he's who he says he is, to accept his challenge. The fans will doubt whether he was ever a World Champion to begin with, and he knows Magnus will say he doesn't care what the fans think, but AJ knows he does, and he knows that Magnus will doubt himself as the World Champion. The deal's on the table, but if he refuses, the real title is walking out the door and it's never coming back. Magnus tells AJ something to make it crystal clear: AJ isn't better than him anymore, he never will be again, and if AJ wants to prove it, he'll prove it next week, one-on-one, two belts, one champion. Dixie tries to stop it, but Magnus says that if it's not happening, then he's gone too because nobody is going to doubt him or his championship ever again. Dixie says AJ isn't even under contract, but Magnus tells Dixie to give him a one night contract so he can face AJ, winner take all. Magnus says he's feeling lucky and feels like rolling the dice, and asks AJ if he feels lucky. AJ extends his hand and...we go off the air.
Thanks for reading the Impact Wrestling Report here on PWInsider.com! No Stu & Pid Show this week (I swear we'll be back on our regular schedule very soon!), but we'll be back to our regularly scheduled program next week!
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