We are in Boston and your announcers are Michael ‘Littleneck’ Cole and John ‘Harvard Business School’ Layfield.
We see what the Shield did on Sunday at Wrestlemania to Randy Orton, Sheamus, and Big Show; and then they challenged The Dead Man, only to be surprised by the arrival of Daniel Bryan and Kane.
Match Number One: Kofi Kingston, Brodus Clay, and Tensai (with Cameron and Naomi) versus Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns, and Seth Rollins
Ambrose and Kingston start things off and Ambrose with a hammer lock and a side head lock. Ambrose with a shoulder tackle but Kofi with leap frogs and a leaping back elbow. Kofi with an elbow and he sends Ambrose over the top rope to the floor. Ambrose with punches when Kofi tries for a baseball slide. Kofi sends Ambrose back in.
Ambrose with a kick and he tags in Rollins. Rollins tries for a hip toss and Kofi with a monkey flip for a near fall. Kofi with a wrist lock and Clay tags in. Clay with a head butt to the midsection and then he punches Clay in the corner. Clay with an Irish whip and splash into the corner. Tensai tags in they hit a side slam elbow drop combination for a near fall. Tensai with a splash into the corner and then he hits a cannonball.
Tensai goes for a Vader Bomb but Reigns and Ambrose pull Rollins to safety. Tensai goes after Ambrose on the apron and Rollins attacks from behind and he hits an enzuigiri. Rollins with kicks and then he chokes Tensai. Ambrose tags in and Reigns with a shot when the referee was out of position. Reigns tags in and he punches Tensai.
Reigns with more punches but Tensai fights his way out of the corner but Reigns with a Samoan drop for a near fall. We go to commercial.
We are back and Rollins with a drop kick to the knee and Rollins gets a near fall. Rollins with a front face lock and Tensai tries to get to his corner to make the tag but Rollins with a forearm to the back and he takes Tensai into his corner. Reigns tag in and he connects with forearms. Reigns with a head butt and he gets a near fall.
Ambrose comes in and he hits a running drop kick and Rollins with a running kick of his own for a near fall. Rollins with a running forearm into the corner. He goes for a second one and connects but Tensai catches Rollins and hits a uranage and both men are down.
Kofi and Ambrose tag in and Kofi with a springboard clothesline followed by chops and a drop kick. Kofi with the leaping clothesline followed by the Boom Drop. Kofi sets for Trouble in Paradise but Reigns distracts Kofi. Kofi with a pendulum kick and a cross body for a near fall.
Kofi tries for SOS but Ambrose with a short arm clothesline. Rollins tags in and he goes up top to hit Kofi with a knee. Reigns spears Clay and Rollins gets the three count on Kofi.
Winners: Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, and Roman Reigns
After the match Reigns pulls Kofi out of the ring and he sends Kofi into the ringside barrier. Rollins and Ambrose kick Clay. Tensai goes after Rollins and Ambrose. Reigns joins in and the numbers give the Shield the advantage.
Reigns has Rollins and Ambrose pick up Tensai for the Cerberus Bomb.
Ambrose picks up Clay and Rollins helps to get Clay up for the Cerberus Bomb.
We take a look at what happened to Alberto Del Rio on Raw when he won a handicap match only to have Dolph Ziggler come out and cash in the Money in the Bank Briefcase and the boyhood dream came true and Dolph Ziggler won the World Title.
Matt Striker is in the interview area with the new World Champion . . .
Big E Langston interrupts and he says that the World Champion does not have time for Matt Striker. He is busy doing media, eating steak dinners with his girlfriend, training and preparing to take over the world. Matt should interview him.
Matt asks Big E what it was like to debut on the biggest stage of them all.
Big E says it was a blast. It was like Christmas, Thanksgiving, Flag Day, and Easter all rolled into one. He says that he remembers losing. He also remembers the joys of his Raw debut and Dolph Ziggler cashing in. He is about to have as much fun in the ring right now.
We go to commercial.
We are back with photos from Wrestlemania.
Match Number Two: Big E Langston versus Zack Ryder
Langston with a back drop and then he sends Ryder into the corner and he punches Zack. The referee pulls Langston out of the corner but Langston puts Ryder back into the corner. Langston misses a splash into the corner but he does not miss with a belly-to-belly suplex. Langston with a running shoulder to the midsection.
Langston runs into Ryder’s knees and Ryder with a drop kick from the turnbuckles. Ryder sets for his running forearm into the corner but Langston with a clothesline. The straps are down and Langston hits the Big Ending for the three count.
Winner: Big E Langston
Michael talks about the Triple H versus Brock Lesnar match and we see photos.
Triple H will be on Smackdown on Friday night.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Michael Cole reads the Rock’s Tweet about his injuries at Wrestlemania. The man who beat him is in the next video feature. Who wants a Raw Rebound of the Mark Henry/John Cena match and what happened after.
Before our next match, Zeb Colter has something to say. He tells us who he is and he says that they are Real Americans. They are glad to say that they are making their first Main Event debut in Boston. The home of the Boston Tea Party and the Battle of Bunker Hill. Zeb asks how many Real Americans are in the crowd.
He asks everyone if they are Real Americans, why do they play a Canadian sport? He talks about high sticking some black piece of rubber around the ice trying to put it into a net. In a place called ‘TD Gardens’. Garden? He does not see any beans, carrots or corn. He says the only claim to fame for Boston is spilling some tea in the harbor and that turncoat Paul Revere. He says that Paul Revere was a turncoat. He tells everyone to read their history.
Yoshi Tatsu comes to the ring and Zeb wants his music stopped. Zeb wants to know if this is Jack’s opponent. Zeb wants to prove a point. He asks Yoshi a few questions. What . . . is . . . your . . . name.
Yoshi tells Zeb his name.
Zeb wants to know what kind of name is Yoshi. His next question is where . . . are . . . you . . . from.
Yoshi says that he is from Japan.
Zeb asks Yoshi what he had for lunch today . . . what did you eat.
Zeb takes the mic away and he says that he probably had rice and fish heads. Zeb wants to know what the deal is with the chop sticks. Wouldn’t it make more sense and more effective to use a fork because you can put more rice on a fork than the tips of two sticks. He asks Yoshi if he drank any sake today. Zeb says that he is just kidding and he wants to make sure that he did not offend Yoshi. He is saying that this culture is not working.
Zeb wants to shake Yoshi’s hand in a offer of gratitude and friendship.
Yoshi refuses and Zeb tells Yoshi not to listen to the fans. They shake hands and then Zeb says that sometimes you gotta trust people. Zeb asks if you show respect and honor by bowing and Zeb bows for Yoshi.
Swagger kicks Yoshi in the chest when he bows and the referee checks on Yoshi.
Match Number Three: Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter) versus Yoshi Tatsu
Swagger backs Yoshi into the corner and he connects with knees. Swagger with punches and kicks to Yoshi but he misses a splash into the corner. Yoshi with forearms and the referee pulls Yoshi out of the corner. Swagger catches Yoshi on a cross body and Swagger with a power slam.
Swagger with boots to the head and we go to commercial.
We are back and Swagger traps the arms. Swagger with an arm bar and boot to the head. Swagger with a suplex and he gets a near fall. Swagger with a front face lock followed by forearms to the back. Swagger with a quarter nelson and chin lock. Swagger with a slam but he misses a leg drop.
Yoshi with chops and kicks. Yoshi with a running boot into the corner and then he hits a rolling mare and then Yoshi with a kick to the chest. Yoshi with a snap elbow drop for a near fall. Yoshi goes up top for the spinning heel kick but Swagger moves. Swagger with the double jump Swagger Bomb and then Jack hits a second one. Swagger wants Yoshi to say ‘We the People’. Swagger applies the ankle lock and Yoshi taps out.
Winner: Jack Swagger
We go to credits.