We are in Lafayette, Louisiana and your announcers are Michael ‘Why aren’t we telling people the city we are in this week’ Cole and Jerry ‘Doesn’t JBL remind you of Burt Campbell’ Lawler.
The first step on the Road to Wrestlemania tonight is made by John Cena who looks pretty happy considering he is in the main event of Wrestlemania even though he fell short against the Shield.
John says that they are in the right place because the Road to Wrestlemania is heating. They announced last year that Wrestlemania would be in the shadow of New York at MetLife Stadium. The sign above the ring means something now because Wrestlemania is taking shape. We know the two title matches. Jack Swagger will face Alberto Del Rio for the World Title. On April 7th, John Cena reminds us that he will try to become the WWE Champion when he faces The Rock.
John is interrupted by CM Punk, who is accompanied by Paul Heyman and they make their way to the ring.
Punk gets in Cena’s face and he tells John that he is fighting the Rock in the main event of Wrestlemania and he wonders if John is positive. That is the easy way out and he expects nothing less from John.
Punk is going to clear the air. Rock beat him last night, fair and square if you ignore the fact that he had Rock pinned for an eighteen count and Rock did strike a referee and the title should be back with him.
Rock beat Cena fair and square at Wrestlemania last year, but John Cena has never beaten him.
Cena says that he is not talking about wins and losses. He won the Royal Rumble so he will face the WWE Champion. For once, it is not about CM Punk so he will have to sit it out.
CM Punk says that it is about him. For 434 days, he was the WWE Champion and he was the best in the world. He faced the best and he beat all of them. John Cena earned his spot in the main event in a circus style match at Royal Rumble. He throws a few ham and eggers over the top rope and he gets the match by the luck of the draw.
Punk says that Rock vs. Cena is a bit of déjà vu and he say the original and Rock beat Cena. Cena can’t beat him.
Cena wants to know what Punk wants him to do.
Punk tells Cena to walk away because he has something that does not belong to him. He tells Cena to walk out of the WWE and get out of his life.
Cena tells Punk no. He gives Punk credit for his honesty. If you sift through the bs and excuses, you probably have a half decent person. Cena says that he is not going to give away a golden ticket to the main event of Wrestlemania. Cena says that Punk has some merit to his points. He has not beaten Punk and he hasn’t beaten the Rock. Cena says that he has some critics. Cena says that Punk wants to be in the main event of Wrestlemania and Cena wants to shut up those critics.
Cena says that he will let Punk earn a chance into the main event. If Cena beats Punk, he shuts his mouth, crawls back into the hole he came from and goes away. If Punk wins, then Cena does not deserve to be in the Main Event of Wrestlemania and Punk can have his spot. He will do it right now. Cena says that Punk talks business and Cena handles business.
Punk discusses something with Paul Heyman and he says that Cena made the stupidest decision of his life. Punk accepts the challenge but he won’t do it tonight. He will do it on his terms. After being screwed last night, he shouldn’t even have to be in this position, so they will do it next week.
Punk and Heyman leave the ring.
Cena says that it is official. Next week, John Cena versus CM Punk with the winner facing Rock at Wrestlemania. Cena vows to beat CM Punk next week.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Matt Striker is with Sheamus. Matt asks Sheamus about a weakness with The Shield. Sheamus says that he let everyone down and he sees Ryback pacing. Sheamus tells Ryback that they need to adapt and overcome. Is Ryback a machine or a mindless Neanderthal. Ryback grabs Sheamus and Chris Jericho tells them to stop it. Jericho says that they need to be mad at the Shield. Jericho says that they need to do what it takes to save this company. Jericho says that he loves WWE. He will not wrestle anywhere else.
Jericho says that Vickie brought him back to Raw because she knows what he brings to the Table. Jericho says that everyone knows the box office appeal of The Shield versus Ryback, Sheamus, and Y2J and that match will take place in Cajun Country.
Sheamus and Ryback say that Jericho has a deal if he can get it done.
Ryback wants to be fed Shield.
Match Number One: Sin Cara versus Mark Henry
Cara avoids Henry and kicks him in the leg but Henry with a head butt and an Irish whip. Henry throws Cara down to the mat and then he stands on Cara’s back. Henry with an Irish whip and splash into the corner. Cara with an enzuigiri from the apron but Cara goes for a head scissors from the apron but Henry catches him and hits a running power slam. Henry picks up Cara for the World’s Strongest Slam and the three count.
Winner: Mark Henry
After the match, Henry continues his attack on Cara and the referee leaves the ring. Henry picks up Cara for another World’s Strongest Slam but Great Khali’s music plays and Cara is in limbo as Khali makes his way to the ring. Henry tosses Cara to the side.
Henry leaves the ring when Khali enters. Henry says that if he wanted to dance, he would get in there.
Michael Cole talks about the United States Title Match and we see footage of the low blow. Miz will face Antonio Cesaro in a No Disqualification Match tonight. We will also get that six man tag match that Chris Jericho requested.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Two: Antonio Cesaro versus Miz in a No Disqualification Match
Miz with a double leg take down and he punches Cesaro. Miz clothesline Cesaro over the top rope to the floor. Miz with a double sledge off the apron. Cesaro sends Miz into the ringside barrier. Miz is sent shoulder first into the ring post. Cesaro is sent back into the ring and Cesaro gets a few chairs and a kendo stick. Cesaro hits Miz with the kendo stick to the shoulder and gets a near fall.
Cesaro puts a chair in the turnbuckles and then he kicks Miz and Miz is able to avoid being sent into the chair. Miz with a sunset flip for a near fall. Cesaro hits Miz with the kendo stick and gets a near fall. Cesaro uses the chair for an arm bar on Miz and he kicks Miz in the injured shoulder.
Cesaro gets another near fall. Cesaro tries to drop Miz on the chair but Miz gets away. Miz with a neck breaker but Miz is sent into the chair in the corner. Miz is put in the ropes and Cesaro with two European uppercuts. Cesaro runs into a boot from Miz and then he avoids a knee in the corner. Cesaro is dropped throat first onto the chair and Miz applies the figure four leg lock and Cesaro taps out.
Michael Cole reminds us that Jack Swagger is the Number One Contender for the World Title. Jerry talks about how Zeb Coulter has changed Swagger.
We see the first Zeb Militia video where he talks about Immigration and how this was a land of opportunity but now it is a Desert of Despair. A number of criminal delinquents have crossed the border. These people have drained this country of its resources and productivity. If you are looking for a handout, they will give you one. It is a one way ticket to wherever you come from.
We are back and Daniel Bryan is walking in the back. Daniel says that instead of hugging last night, Kane uppercut him in the jaw. Daniel says that he does not trust Kane any more. He is going to wrestle Jack Swagger and he doesn’t want Kane out there.
Kane says that he will ask for a match and he doesn’t want Daniel Bryan to come out for the match and he says that he better night act like a snake.
Randy asks if someone is talking about him.
Kane says that he doesn’t like snakes and if they get too close, he stomps on them with his boot.
Randy says that at one point Kane would have him shaking in his boot but since Kane turned in his choke slams for hugs, he is more like Barney.
Daniel likes that.
Vickie Guerrero is on the phone and she says that she has some surprises planned.
Paul Heyman stops by and Vickie congratulates Paul for those stipulations. Rock was able to retain his title. Paul says that he has nothing to say to Vickie. Vickie says that she has dramatic news for Paul that will affect his career. Paul wants to know. She is going to tell us in the ring. Paul says that he loves overdramatic women and he says that he does not like surprises.
Match Number Three: Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez) versus Dolph Ziggler (with Big E Langston and AJ Lee)
Ziggler with a kick and drop kick followed by punches. Del Rio with a back heel kick but Ziggler with a kick. Del Rio sends Ziggler to the apron and Del Rio with a step up enzuigiri and Ziggler falls awkwardly to the floor and we go to commercial.
We are back and Ziggler is back in control and he chokes Del Rio in the ropes. Ziggler with a drop kick and he gets a near fall. Ziggler chokes Del Rio in the ropes and then he talks to the referee while Langston punches Del Rio. Ziggler gets a near fall and then he applies a reverse chin lock. We see Zeb Coulter and Jack Swagger watching in the back on the monitor.
Del Rio with punches but Ziggler with a knee to the midsection. Ziggler with a Fameasser for a near fall. Ziggler goes up top but Del Rio hits the ropes and Ziggler is crotched. Del Rio with a round kick to the back and then he goes for a reverse superplex and both men are down. Ziggler punches Del Rio but Del Rio punches back. They go back and forth until they go with kicks. Ziggler misses a clothesline while Del Rio hits two. Ziggler misses another clothesline and Del Rio with a tilt-a-whirl back breaker. Del Rio with a super kick and he gets a near fall.
Del Rio signals for the cross arm breaker but he takes too long and Ziggler with a swinging neck breaker for a near fall. Del Rio with an Irish whip but Ziggler gets his feet up. Del Rio puts Ziggler in the ropes and connects with a series of forearms to the lower back and he follows with a lungblower for a near fall because Ziggler gets his hand on the rope.
Del Rio signals for the cross arm breaker and Langston gets on the apron. Del Rio with a drop kick to Langston to knock him off the apron. Ziggler tries for a DDT but Del Rio gets free and he applies the cross arm breaker and Ziggler taps out.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
After the match, Langston with a running body block on Del Rio and then he gets Del Rio up for the Big Ending and he hits it.
Ziggler grabs the briefcase and he gives it to the referee steals the contract and goes to the back. Langston forces Ricardo to drop the case. AJ gets the case and gives it to Dolph but Alberto with an enzuigiri.
We go to commercial.
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