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WWE RAW REPORT: GUESS WHO IS THE REFEREE FOR THE WWE TITLE MATCH; A DIVA MANIFESTO; A FEW MATCHES THAT SOME EXPECTED ON SUNDAY; A CONTRACT SIGNING WITH A SPECIAL GUEST CAMEO VIA VIDEO

By Richard Trionfo on 2011-08-08 23:13:16
We are live from San Jose, California and your announcers are Michael ‘When are the 49ers going to start playing here’ Cole, Jerry ‘When are the Athletics going to start playing here’ Lawler and Jim ‘When are the Raiders going to start playing here’ Ross.

Triple H makes his way to the ring because he has something to say. He says in six nights it will be one of the most historic nights in the history of the WWE. It will be one of those nights where the entire face and landscape of this business changes. It will be the wwe champion John Cena against the WWE Champion CM Punk. He says that change has been a big thing around here. In the last month we have gone from no WWE Champion and Vince McMahon in charge to Hunter being in charge and there being two WWE Champions. It is a situation he will rectify Sunday in that match. There will be one Undisputed winner and one Undisputed WWE Champion. Hunter says that he is here to resolve the ‘undisputed’ part. Since this is the WWE anything can happen.

To ensure that there is one champion, you empower one man to make things happen. One man whose power will be respected and absolute. It is a man who is larger than life. It is a man who casts a shadow over CM Punk and John Cena. It is a man who casts a shadow over the entire WWE. It is him. At this point in time, he is the only person he can absolutely trust here. Hunter says that he will stand in the ring and he will officiate that contest. He will officiate it like he sees it. When the dust clears on Sunday, there will be one Undisputed WWE Champion.

Tonight will be the official contract signing between John Cena and CM Punk. Before we get there, they will each be in matches tonight. John Cena’s match will take place right now.

Cena has something to say to Hunter before his opponent comes to the ring. Hunter tells Cena not to tell him how to officiate the match.

We go to commercial.

We are back and we hear what John Cena was saying to Triple H before the commercial. Cena told Hunter that this shouldn’t be an ego thing. Hunter says that whatever happens will happen because he wanted it to.

Match Number One: John Cena versus Jack Swagger

They lock up and Swagger with a front face lock and he rolls Cena around the ring and he slaps Cena in the head. Swagger does a lap and Cena with a clothesline followed by an Irish whip and suplex into a near fall. Cena with a reverse chin lock into a side head lock. Cena with a shoulder tackle followed by an Irish whip and splash into the corner followed by a drop kick for a near fall. Cena with an arm bar. Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex for a near fall.

Swagger with kicks to Cena followed by punches and more kicks until the referee pulls him out of the corner. Swagger with a hard Irish whip and Swagger hits the double jump Swagger Bomb for a near fall. Swagger traps Cena’s arms and Cena struggles to get to his feet. Cena with a knee to the midsection followed by a gutwrench suplex and both men are down.

Cena misses a splash into the corner when Swagger moves out of the way. Swagger with a running shoulder tackle to Cena for a near fall. Swagger with a key lock on Cena. Swagger with a hard Irish whip followed by another Irish whip and a flying shoulder into the knee. Swagger does a lap and then he goes for the ankle lock but Cena is able to try for the STF but Swagger escapes. Cena with two flying shoulder tackles followed by the Blue Thunder Bomb and then it is time for the five knuckle shuffle. Cena finishes off the Vintage Legendary Sequence with the Attitude Adjustment for the three count.

Winner: John Cena

We go to commercial.

We are back with a SummerSlam Recall: 1991 for Curt Hennig versus Bret Hart for the Intercontinental Title.

Ricardo Rodriguez interrupts Scott Stanford to introduce Alberto Del Rio. CM Punk calls himself the voice of the voiceless when he is the voice of the gutless. When he won the title in Chicago, he run when he saw Alberto ready to cash in his briefcase. Alberto says that he will show Punk what would have happened that night in Chicago.

Jim Ross and Michael Cole talk about the R Truth and John Morrison feud and we go back four months ago in the days of the Glass Jar for Michael Cole and the night that R Truth turned heel.

R Truth tells us that he is a Gooooooooooooooooooood R Truth. Josh Mathews asks Truth why would he take advantage of his friend. Truth says why a few dozen times. Truth asks a few major questions about the important things in life. He wants to know why God created spiders. Why does he hate spiders? He says that spiders are creepy. They have them nasty, hairy legs and they are quiet. When they get a chance, they bite you. Ain’t nobody friends with spiders. Back in the day, grandma would get some carrots, potatoes, and a big old turnip to make some spider stew. Truth says that the only person who would eat the spider stew is Little Jimmy, but that is a different subject. Truth says that he is going to step on that spider tonight and squish him into the mat and the spider’s name is John Morrison.

We go to commercial.

Match Number Two: Rey Mysterio versus Miz

Miz attacks Rey on the stage while he does his entrance with the pyro. Miz with knees and then he sends Rey into the WWE logo on the stage. He slams Rey’s head into the logo a few more times. Miz is held back by the officials but he gets in a few more shots.

Michael Cole goes to the ring to find out why Miz attacked Rey. Cole says that was an unbelievable display of audacity.

Miz takes the mic and he asks Cole if he knows who he is facing at SummerSlam and he has no idea. Miz says that the emphasis is on the WWE Title, but it should be on him because he is the most Must See Champion in WWE history. Miz says that he is all over the media and trending all over the world. He says that if he has to do that to Rey in order to get attention for himself, then he will do it. Miz wants someone to declare him the winner of the match by forfeit.

A referee comes to the ring and he tells Justin Roberts to announce that Miz will have a new opponent instead of a forfeit.

Match Number Two: Miz versus Kofi Kingston

Kofi looks over his shoulder while he poses for the crowd on the turnbuckles because of what Miz did to Rey.

They lock up and Miz backs Kofi into the corner and he gives a clean break but he tries for a punch and kick but he misses. Kofi with a side head lock into a hammer lock. Miz with an elbow into a side head lock. Miz with a shoulder tackle. Kofi with a leap frog and a drop kick for a near fall. Kofi with a side head lock and then Miz punches Kofi in the corner. Miz with kicks to Kofi.

Miz with an Irish whip and then he sets for the Awesome clothesline but Kofi turns it into a Thesz Press and he punches Miz. Kofi clotheslines Miz over the top rope to the floor and then he hits a suicide dive onto Miz and he returns to the ring. We go to commercial.

We are back and Miz with a reverse chin lock on Kofi. We see footage from the commercial break when Miz pulled out the ring skirt to crotch Kofi followed by a clothesline on the floor. Back to the live action, Kofi gets to his feet and he kicks Miz in the leg. Kofi slides under for a rollup Miz misses a running boot and Kofi gets a near fall. Miz hits the right handed Awesome clothesline and then he goes up top for a double sledge to the top of the head and he gets a near fall.

Miz with a reverse chin lock and punches to the face. Kofi punches Miz and takes Miz down with an arm drag. Miz runs into an elbow from Kofi and Kofi with another rollup for a near fall. Kofi with chops to Miz followed by a drop kick. Miz counters the Superman punch and he tries for The Reality Check but Kofi blocks the second neck breaker. Kofi leaps into the corner but Miz moves. Kofi with a double jump corkscrew cross body for a near fall.

Miz with a DDT to Kofi and he gets a near fall. Miz sets for the Awesome Clothesline again but Kofi moves and hits the pendulum kick. Kofi goes up top but Miz punches Kofi to stop him. Miz tries for a superplex but Kofi with forearms and he hits a sunset flip power bomb but Miz is able to kick out. Kofi sets for Trouble in Paradise but he misses. Miz tries for the Skull Crushing Finale but Kofi sends Miz into the turnbuckles. Kofi gets on Miz’s shoulders and Miz hot shots Kofi and then hits the Skull Crushing Finale for the three count.

Winner: Miz

CM Punk walks in the back and Josh Mathews stops him. Josh asks Punk for his thoughts on Triple H naming himself the referee. Punk says that he isn’t shocked because Hunter has a bigger ego than his father in law. Punk says that Hunter should keep his nose out of their business. He says that Hunter needs the spotlight even though it is the biggest WWE Championship match. Punk says that the best thing for business on Sunday is for him to be the WWE Champion. Punk says that he is going to take care of Alberto Del Rio tonight and he will show Del Rio what would have happened if he cashed in at Money in the Bank.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Did You Know that WWE wrestled all over the world?

Match Number Three: Alberto Del Rio with Ricardo Rodriguez versus CM Punk in a Non Title Match

They lock up and Punk misses a round kick when Del Rio moves out of the way. Del Rio with kicks to Punk and the referee warns him. Del Rio works on the arm. Punk with a back heel kick to Del Rio and then he connects with shoulders in the corner followed by an Irish whip but Del Rio moves when Punk charges into the corner. Del Rio works on the arms against the ring post and he pulls the arms into the post. Del Rio with an arm breaker for a near fall.

Del Rio with an arm bar. Punk with kicks and he tries for a sunset flip but Del Rio does not go over and he connects with an elbow drop. Del Rio with a punch and then he tries for a splash into the ropes and Punk moves out of the way and Del Rio goes to the floor while Punk tries to get the feeling back into his arms.

Del Rio returns to the ring and Punk with a neck breaker and knees to the head. Punk with an Irish whip and a running knee into the corner followed by a bulldog. Punk goes to the apron for the springboard clothesline and he hits it. Punk signals that it is time for Del Rio to go nappy time Del Rio is on Punk’s shoulders but Del Rio escapes and he sends Punk shoulder first into the corner followed by a lungblower for a near fall. Del Rio kicks Punk in the head.

Del Rio sets for the float over into the cross arm breaker but Punk gets away and Punk with a round kick followed by a Go To Sleep for the three count.

Winner: CM Punk

We are back with the WWE Rewind: The Divas Battle Royal from last week and Beth Phoenix showing that you do not hug your opponent in wrestling.

Match Number Four: Beth Phoenix versus Eve Torres

They lock up and Beth backs Eve into the ropes and Beth with an elbow instead of a break. Eve with a drop kick to the belly button and then she is sent to the apron. Eve with an elbow but Beth knocks Eve off the apron. Beth sends Eve into the ringside barrier. They return to the ring and Beth gets a near fall.

Beth picks up Eve by the hair and drives her to the mat again. Beth picks up Eve by the hair again and then she drops an elbow and gets a near fall. Eve with an enzuigiri to Beth followed by a forearm and a bicycle kick but Beth stays on her feet. Beth with an Irish whip and then she hits a running forearm to the back. Eve with a round kick to Beth and then Eve goes up top for the moonsault but Beth stops her and then she hits the Glam Slam for the three count.

Winner: Beth Phoenix

After the match, Beth wants the mic. She says that she is sick of Divas like her and Kelly Kelly making a mockery of the Divas division. No more booty popping. No more splits. No more stink faces. Beth says that she has been meaning to ask Eve a question but before she can ask the question, Kelly comes from behind and hits Beth with the title belt.

We go to commercial.

We are back with footage of Miz and John Cena from the Teen Choice Awards.

Match Number Five: Dolph Ziggler with Vickie Guerrero versus Alex Riley in a Non Title Match

Before the match starts, Riley gets on the mic and she tells Vickie that he doesn’t want to say that she has bad breath but it smells like death took a dump in her mouth.

Riley with a clothesline to Ziggler and he gets a near fall. Vickie yells at Riley and Ziggler kicks Riley and the referee warns him while Vickie continues to yell. Riley with a back elbow and then he tries for the sleeper but Riley is able to avoid it. Vickie pulls the ropes away from Riley but Riley backs Ziggler into the ropes. Riley with a spinebuster and Vickie gets into the ring and she yells at Riley Vickie tells Riley to stop smiling at her and then she slaps Riley. The referee calls for the bell.

Winner: Alex Riley by disqualification

After the match, Ziggler and Vickie argue. Ziggler pie faces Riley and then Riley hits Dolph and Dolph collides with Vickie and Vickie goes down as well. Vickie leaves the ring and they yell at each other from a distance.

It is time to discuss the WWE Championship Match on Sunday and we have a video package with an imposing voice over to show the history of the build over the last month.

It is time to run through the card for SummerSlam.

Match Number Six: R Truth versus John Morrison in a Four Months and Two Surgeries in the Making Match

Truth with punches and knees to Morrison but Morrison with a vintage clothesline followed by a leg lariat and then he hits the standing C4 for a near fall. Morrison with a European uppercut followed by punches and he sets for the corkscrew split legged moonsault but he senses that Truth moved out of the way and he lands on his feet. Truth goes to the floor and Morrison with a corkscrew pescado over the ring post.

Truth rolls back in and then back to the floor. Morrison goes outside the ring and he sends Truth into the ringside barrier. Morrison tells Truth that he tried to end his career on May 2nd. Truth sends Morrison into the ring bell pit and Morrison punches Truth. Morrison stands on the barrier and Truth trips Morrison and Morrison hits the barrier with the back of his neck.

Morrison holds his neck while the referee makes his count. Morrison rolls back in and Truth kicks Morrison. Truth with a hip toss and then he hits Morrison in the head as he works on the neck. Truth with a reverse chin lock on Morrison. Truth with a sit out gourdbuster and then he tries for Shut Up but Morrison holds on to the ropes. Morrison with kicks followed by an Irish whip and a kick in the corner. Truth with a kick followed by Shut Up and he gets the three count.

Winner: R Truth

Triple H and John Laurinaitis are in the back looking over the contract as we go to commercial.

We are back and we are reminded that Rey Mysterio will face the winner of the WWE Title match on Sunday next Monday on Raw in San Diego.

We find out that the WWE Universe thinks that John Cena is going to win on Sunday by a 54/46 margin.

Christian is in Sacramento and Cole asks what up and Christian says that he is trying to disrespect the champion. Christian says that he is focusing on the announcement that he is going to make. He tells the COO that it would behoove him to appear live this Friday on Smackdown because he is certain that Hunter will want to hear what he has to say.

Triple H is joined by John Laurinaitis in the ring with the official contract signing table.

CM Punk makes his way to the ring and he stands in the corner.

John Cena comes out next and they put their belts next to each other and Punk’s is bigger.

Hunter says that they can cut through the chase, but Punk interrupts. Punk says that we know the match is official and we know where it is going. Punk wants to know why they are out here. Punk wants to know the last time a contract signing didn’t end with some horrible physical calamity. Punk suggests that we can turn over the table and beat people up or we can make it entertaining.

Punk says that he is on the set of Conan O’Brien and he says that he is getting ready to show a clip. Punk says that he has a clip from a movie star with his thoughts about John Cena. Punk says it isn’t Triple H, it is a real movie star.

Punk sends it to Dwayne. We go to a video from the Rock where he talks about why John Cena is angry. He says that it is the same process where he puts on his tough guy sneakers and his tough guy jean shorts that nobody has put on since 1992. He puts on his tough guy wrist bands so he can get his superhero powers. He says that Cena looks like a transvestite Wonder Woman. Then his music hits and Rock does an instrumental version. He says that Cena is full of energy and fire until his music stops. Then he hears what eats away at his soul. Rock does the dual chant. Rock says that Cena goes to his home town and he gets booed because men don’t like him and they can smell a phony punk a mile away.

Punk mouths ‘wow’ after seeing that.

Punk says that they aren’t saying ‘Cena Sucks’ but they are saying ‘CM Punk’. He says that for everything that Dwayne said that was right. Cena might be a phony, but Rock is as big a phony as Cena is. Maybe Dwayne will be upset. Punk says that he doesn’t want Dwayne to say things in the same voice about him so he will sign the contract.

Cena stops Punk and he says that Punk has everyone going crazy. Cena says that a guy like Dwayne the Rock Johnson is doing this. He is a future Hall of Famer. He is main eventing WRestlemnia. He is a bona fide movie star, currently filming GI Joe. He says that Rock doesn’t have anything annoy him. Cena says that Rock is annoyed at him for the way he dresses.

Cena says that Punk’s issues are the issues of the voiceless. He is too part of the system or too PG. Maybe he is the modern day Hulk Hogan and he moved the hand from behind his ear to in front of his face.

Cena says that the Rock is a star and he has his millions. He could talk trash about the Rock and he will never win over the millions. CM Punk has his fans and Cena says that he knows that he could increase his workrate, add to his five moves or doom, or work on his heel promo and win them over, but he doesn’t have to do that. Cena says that he was originally angered by the comparison to the Yankees, but he realized that the Yankees are the most hated and most beloved team in sports.

Cena acknowledges that there are people who hate him. Cena says that when he runs to the ring, it is like coming to the ring in pinstripes. He doesn’t care about the people who hate him He cares about the people who wear the colors and are loyal to him. Those are the people he cares about.

Cena says that there is nothing phony about that. Punk speaks his mind and he might throw a lot of stones at glass houses. He wanted the private jets, to be in movies, and on ice cream bars. Punk wants to come back as the underground voice of the voiceless He tells Punk that if he wants to see phony, he should look in the mirror.

Hunter says that Cena makes a good point. Hunter says that at the end of the day Punk is a guy who held out for more money and a few perks. Hunter says that Punk ran away and didn’t negotiate face to face.

Punk asks Hunter who fires him. Is it him or ‘Funk Man’. Did Johnny face to face fire Vladimir Kozlov personally. Did he fly to Florida to tell Harry Smith that he is no longer wanted here. Did he fire Chris Masters face to face or did he call him and tell him it was a budget thing. He gets Johnny to do the hard jobs. He says that it is not about them.

Punk tells Cena that it is about them and the WWE Championship. It is easy for Cena act all holier than thou when he has been given chance after chance. Cena is on a pedestal and he looks down on everyone. Punk says that he won the ECW Title, his first title in WWE. The next day, Cena pat him on the back and congratulated him and said that he almost gave up on him after rarely saying anything to him. Punk says that he has held a grudge since then. Punk says that Cena gave up that dream to be a bodybuilder and a sports entertainer and couldn’t hack it. Punk says that he started as a professional wrestler and he held out for some perks. Punk says that he wants that ice cream bar. He says that Cena is the lion while he is the hyenna. He has to hold people up to get the perks that are handed to Cena.

Punk says that Cena won his first WWE Title seven years ago in Los Angeles. On Sunday he is walking out of Los Angeles with nothing. Cena will be a big star the next day starring in Marine 4 or having his fight with Dwayne. He will have his legion of fans who will pee in their pajamas every time they think about him. John will not have the WWE Championship because CM Punk says that he will be the WWE Champion.

Punk signs the contract.

Cena tells Punk that was a fine speech. Cena tells Punk that he has a lot of pressure on him Sunday because Punk won one match in Chicago at Money in the Bank. Punk has every right to be the WWE Champion. Has Punk thought about what happens if he loses at SummerSlam. Cena says that he will be facing the Rock at Wrestlemania. He says that Punk needs this match more because people are watching him. Punk might speak his mind, but he has to back it up when the bell rings. If he doesn’t back it up, Punk is a loudmouth one hit wonder. Cena tells Punk that he will be known as Buster Douglas, Yahoo Serious, or Milli Vanilli. If Punk does not produce when it is on the line, it is gone, (Cena snaps his fingers) just like this. He wishes Punk luck.

Punk says that luck is for losers and he would rather be a one hit wonder than a phony.

Cena says that they have been talking for a while and Punk wants to entertain people. Cena says that the talking is wearing thin.

Punk says that he likes the talking, but he can put his fist down Cena’s throat.

They get face to face and Laurinaitis gets in the middle. Punk with a round kick to Laurinaitis and then Cena goes after Punk but he accidentally hits Hunter.

Punk wants to know if the fix is in.

We have a Three Way Dance Stand Off.

We go to credits.

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