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We start off with the man who is no longer suspended and who has less than a week. Punk does not have a mic, he has a megaphone.
Punk takes a seat in the center of the ring and he wants to know if he has everyone’s attention now. Punk makes sure the mic is working. He feels like he needs to recap things. Punk says that he did not watch last week because he was not on. He reminds everyone that he was suspended by Vincent K. McMahon. Punk says that he got in some trouble for things that he said. He says that he did not get in trouble because he announced when his contract would end. He did not get in trouble for saying that he would defeat John Cena at Money in the Bank and taking the title with him out of the WWE. He did not just get in trouble for mentioning that the company will fall into the hands of Vince’s idiotic daughter and doofus son in law. Punk says that he got in trouble for having the balls to say things that others would not say.
Punk says that the company inside and outside the ring are filled with a parade of shameless ass kissers. Punk says that not only is he reinstated and not only is his title match with John Cena back on, Punk says that he brought back up in case they cut off his microphone.
Punk says that it is just in case.
He says that some are wondering why Punk is holding a live mic. Punk says that Vince is trying to sign him to a long term and lucrative contract with WWE. Punk says that it is funny that Vince is bending over backwards. Punk says that all he wanted with a microphone because it is power. Punk says that in the hands of everyone, it is a microphone. In Punk’s hands, it is a pipe bomb. Punk says that Vince sees him as the hottest commodity in this industry. He finally sees that way because Punk did something that the endless suits could not do. He says that he made the WWE socially relevant. Punk says that he is not talking about the people in the building, he is talking about the real world.
The company gets mentioned for two reasons. First for CM Punk speaking his mind. The second is when somebody dies. Now because of CM Punk, the WWE is all over the internet. ESPN is trying to get him on their shows. Jimmy Kimmel is begging him to appear on his show.
Punk says that it is funny that he has one foot out the door and now Vince is ready to offer him everything. If Vince treated him this nice five years ago, he would not have this much pent up ammunition.
Punk sits down again. He says that he knows Vince McMahon and he knows how Vince does business. Punk says that Vince will want to sit down man to man. Punk says that they should have the first ever live contract negotiation in the ring. Punk says that maybe he will sign, maybe he won’t. Maybe Vince McMahon will have to join the CM Punk Kiss My Ass Club.
John Cena’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring. Punk tells Cena to turn down his music because it is too loud.
Punk points out that John Cena is in the ring with him and the fans are not too happy.
Punk thanks Cena for getting him reinstated for a job he did not want in the first place. He thanks Cena for giving him everything that he wanted. Not only will he win the title, which he is going to change the look of because it has looked far too ugly for far too long.
Cena made many things completely real. Punk says that he will win and he will leave with the title. He points out that Cena will be fired. Punk says that if Cena thinks that Vince is going to fire him and Punk reminds Cena of the seven days that Cena was fired the last time.
Cena asks Punk if he is finished, and Punk says that he is probably not.
Cena congratulates Punk for pointing out that he has a set of balls. Cena says that he has heard Punk say that he is walking out of Chicago with the title and Punk is acting like Cena is a pushover. Cena says that it sounds like nobody is going to stop Punk in Chicago. Cena says that he is no pushover.
Cena points out that Punk said that he is the best wrestler. Punk interrupts and says that he is the best wrestler in the world. Cena says that Punk has a set of balls and self-confidence.
Cena says that he is the best because he has the title and he earned it. Cena says that Punk thinks that he is the best wrestler, but there are a lot of people who thought that. Triple H, John Layfield, Edge, Batista, Kurt Angle, Shawn Michaels, and Eddie Guerrero. They thought that Cena couldn’t hang with him in the ring but they were left disappointed.
Cena says that he doesn’t care if Punk stays or goes or if Vince fires him or not, he is going to come to Chicago and kick Punk’s ass.
The General Manager interrupts with his dingy ding dong. Cole reads it and says that Vince McMahon is on his way to negotiate with CM Punk. If this is John Cena’s last night on Raw, he should be in action. John Cena will be in a very special match next.
We go to commercial with Punk wishing Cena luck over his megaphone.
We are back and John Cena is trying to figure out what type of match he is in.
Match Number One: John Cena versus David Otunga and Michael McGillicutty in a Who is Really Handicapped Match
Otunga starts off for the tag team champions and they lock up. Cena with a waist lock and Otunga with a wrist lock but Cena gets out of the hold. Cena with a snap mare into a reverse chin lock and Otunga makes it to the ropes. Michael tags in and they lock up. Michael works on the arm and he puts Cena in a hammer lock. Cena with a side head lock on Michael followed by a shoulder tackle. Cena with a hip toss and drop kick that sends Michael to the floor. Otunga goes to check on Michael and we go to commercial.
We are back and Michael with a side head lock and we see footage from the commercial break when Otunga sent Cena into the ringside barrier. Cena gets kicked into the corner and Michael kicks him. Otunga gets a kick in while the referee deals with Michael. Michael with a punch to Cena. Otunga tags in and they send Cena into the corner. Otunga with a punch and choke in the corner.
Michael chokes Cena from the apron. Otunga with a hard Irish whip and Otunga does the Nexus salute for no apparent reason. Otunga tries for a suplex but Cena blocks it and he hits a suplex of his own. Michael tags back in and Cena moves when Michael tries for a splash into the corner. Cena with two flying shoulder tackles followed by a Blue Thunder Bomb and the five knuckle shuffle. Cena gets Michael up for the Attitude Adjustment but Otunga interferes. Otunga with a reverse atomic drop followed by a drop kick from Michael and McGillicutty gets a near fall.
Michael puts Cena on the top turnbuckle and he punches Cena. Michael tries for a superplex but Cena blocks it and Cena with head butts to knock Michael off the turnbuckles. Cena takes care of Otunga on the apron and Cena with the leg drop off the turnbuckles and Michael is put in the STF and Otunga breaks it up.
Otunga punches Cena and Michael joins in. Michael with a running elbow but Otunga misses a splash into the corner. Cena with an Attitude Adjustment to Michael and then he throws Otunga over the top rope before getting the three count.
Winner: John Cena
We go to commercial.
We are back and in case you want to see Edge, he will be on the Season Premiere of Haven on Friday.
Michael Cole quotes Gorilla Monsoon when talking about the match between Big Show and Mark Henry. We have a video package.
Vickie is in the back with Dolph Ziggler and they run through what Dolph is going to say to Vince. He says that Vince should fire CM Punk and John Cena and make the United States Title the most important title. Dolph says that Vince looked like a wuss last week. Vinceki says that she is strong.
Drew interrupts and he has a Vince-Off with Vickie. Dolph says that Vince is a shell of a man. If he cannot grasp what Dolph has, he should be the Chairman of AARP. Dolph suggests that Vince should retire.
Drew, Dolph, and Vickie have an escalation of insults for Vince until Vince walks up behind them.
Vince says hello to two of his fastest rising stars. He says that they deserve to have the spotlight. Vince suggests that they team up tonight in a handicap match against a really really big opponent. Someone like The Big Show.
Dolph and Drew thank Vince. Vince asks them if they have a mint and everyone is at a loss. Vince says that he wouldn’t want to have BAD BREATH.
They walk away.
Scott Stanford asks Vince what is going to happen during the live contract negotiations. Vince tells the entire world to go to hell.
Vince walks away.
Kelly walks us into commercial.
We are back with the WWE Rewind: Kelly Kelly winning the Divas Title from Brie Bella.
The Bellas have joined Jerry and Michael at the announce table so get ready for some broadcasting gold.
Match Number Two: Melina versus Kelly Kelly in a Non Title Match
They lock up and Melina with a snap mare and kick to the back. Melina with a knee followed by a Japanese choke hold. Kelly with elbows and clotheslines. Kelly with an Irish whip and a handspring back elbow into the corner. Kelly with the Stinkface to Melina followed by a neck breaker for a near fall. Melina with a kick but she misses a kick and Melina does a split. Kelly with a screaming K2 for the three count.
Winner: Kelly Kelly
After the match, Nikki and Brie have mics. They come into the ring and Brie suggests that Kelly can go get some food. They both suggest that Kelly could use some food. Kelly has had enough and she hits a Thesz Press since she didn’t get to do it during the match. Nikki and Brie attack Kelly but Eve makes her way to the ring. Eve is taken care of with an X Factor.
The Miz is walking in the back and he is on his way to the ring as we go to commercial.
We are back with the Slam of the Week: Alex Riley beating Miz last week with a back slide and the subsequent ass kicking by Miz.
Miz comes out to the ring and he has something to say. We see ladders all over the ringside area and there is a ladder in the center of the ring under the briefcase.
Miz climbs the ladder and sits under the briefcase. Miz says that there is no better view than sitting on top of this ladder and looking down on each and every person. Miz says that he is used to being on top and being the best. It makes him different than everyone else in the Money in the Bank match. It is not because he is the Most Must See Superstar of All Time. It is about knowing about this path to the WWE Title. He says that he has been there before, unlike any of his opponents. Many have been close, but close does not make them a winner or a champion. Everyone will find out that he still has what it takes to be a champion.
Miz says that he is quite comfortable up here because this is where the future happens. Miz says that he is still the future. Every pretender on Sunday will learn why he is the Miz and he’s . . .
stopped by the All American American who makes his way to the ring with a mic. Swagger asks rhetorically if Miz is the future and at the top. He says that Alex Riley must have hit him too many times. Swagger says that he has won the Money in the Bank match and he has cashed in the briefcase to become the World Champion. Swagger says that he is going to do it again.
Miz throws out a few reallys at Swagger. Miz asks Swagger if someone wins Money in the Bank and cashes it in but nobody remembers, did it really happen.
Evan Bourne comes out and he says that he is sick and tired of hearing what everyone has done before, but Evan says that he is going to win the match on Sunday.
Kofi Kingston comes out with his pyro and he says that he appreciates Evan’s confidence but at the end of the day, it is all talk. This is Money in the Bank that we are talking about. It is an eight man ladder match where everybody puts everything on the line. All for a chance at the most prestigious champion in the history of the WWE. Anything can happen when you step through the ropes. Kofi says that if he wins, it is not because of what he says tonight. It will be because of what he does on Sunday. Kofi says that it isn’t a coincidence that the greatest superstar in history had to retire because of being in matches like this.
R Truth comes out and he tells the Little Jimmys in the ring that the conspiracies against Truth continues. Everyone is talking about CM Punk versus John Cena, but two weeks ago, he beat John Cena. Truth sent the WWE Champion through a table and all of the Little Jimmys saw it. Now he has to climb a ladder and grab a briefcase. How is he supposed to climb a ladder and grab a briefcase when he got acrophobia. The conspiracy knows that he is afraid of heights. There better not be one spider on this ladder because he is afraid of those too. Truth looks up at the briefcase and he says that if he opens it up and he sees a spider, the grits gonna hit the pan. The briefcase is gonna get got.
Truth is interrupted by Alex Riley who is not going to say anything. He wants a piece of the Miz and Miz leaves the ring.
Alberto Del Rio makes his way into the building in his car, but still not the same without Ricardo Rodriguez. He says that this is an absolute disgrace. He shouldn’t be in this match. He took care of Rey Mysterio so he is the Number One Contender. Alberto asks why. He says that John Cena is afraid of him. Now he has to do it all over again just to show that it is his destiny to be the WWE Champion. In six days, he will teach a lesson to every single one of them.
The dingy ding do sounds and Michael Cole has a message to read. Alberto Del Rio has a point. Since six of the competitors are in the ring, let’s have a match. Miz, Jack Swagger, and R Truth will face Evan Bourne, Alex Riley, and Kofi Kingston in a Six Man Tag Match.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Three: Evan Bourne, Kofi Kingston, and Alex Riley versus Miz, Jack Swagger, and R Truth in a We Have a Multi Man Match on Sunday so we need a Tag Match tonight Match
The match is joined in progress and Swagger with an arm bar to Bourne. Bourne with kicks but Swagger with a take down and he tags in Miz. Miz with knees to Bourne followed by a knee lift. Miz chokes Bourne in the ropes and then he kicks Bourne in the head to get a near fall. Truth tags in and he punches Bourne. Truth with a slam followed by a spinning leg drop for a near fall.
Truth chokes Bourne and the referee warns Truth. Truth with a rear chin lock on Bourne. Bourne tries to make the tag but Truth keeps him out of the corner. Truth with a delayed gourdbuster for a near fall. Truth has something to say to the referee. Truth with a front face lock. Bourne tries to make it to the corner to make the tag but Truth stops his momentum. Truth with a suplex into a stunner for a near fall.
Truth chokes Bourne in the ropes but he misses the axe kick and Bourne with a knee to the chin that staggers Truth. Kofi tags in and hits a springboard clothesline followed by a drop kick and a Superman punch. Kofi sets for the Boom drop and he hits it. Kofi sets for Trouble in Paradise but he knocks Swagger off the apron instead. Truth hits Kofi and then Irish whips him. Kofi with a pendulum kick followed by a cross body for a near fall that is broken up by Miz.
Truth clotheslines Kofi through the ropes and to the floor. Miz tags in and we go to commercial.
We are back and Miz with an elbow to Kofi for a near fall. Truth tags in and they hit a double suplex on Kofi and Truth gets a near fall. Truth with a head scissors to Kofi but since Kofi is not Austin Aries, you can keep him in the hold. Kofi finally escapes and Truth punches Kofi.
Swagger tags in and Kofi kicks his way out of trouble but Swagger and Truth stop Kofi. Kofi with a double DDT and all three men are down. Riley tags in and Riley with a spear and punches to Swagger. Riley with running back elbows followed by a spinebuster. Riley brings Miz into the ring and then he kicks Swagger. Truth hits Riley from behind but Bourne with a flying knee to Truth. Swagger misses the Swagger Bomb and Riley with a DDT for the three count.
Winners:
After the match, Miz hits Riley with the Skull Crushing Finale. Kofi takes care of Miz with a drop kick. Truth knocks Kofi out of the ring. Bourne with a leaping knee to Truth and he sets for the Shooting Star Press but Alberto Del Rio attacks Bourne on the top turnbuckle. Del Rio takes a ladder and he hits everyone in the ring with it. Then he throws the ladder at Miz.
We take a look back at last week’s Raw.
We see what happened two weeks ago when Mark Henry knocked Big Show out of the steel cage.
Match Number Four: Drew McIntyre and Dolph Ziggler with Vickie Guerrero versus Big Show
Dolph starts off but he tags in Drew before doing anything. Show brings Drew into the ring and he chops Dolph off the apron. Show with a head butt to Drew followed by an Irish whip and clothesline into the corner. Show with a forearm across the back and then he punches Drew in the midsection. Show with a short arm clothesline followed by a slam. Drew screams in pain after the slam. Show sends Drew over the top rope to the floor.
Show sends Drew into the ringside barrier while Dolph does his best to avoid making eye contact with Show. Show with elbows to the head as they fight by the ramp. Show throws Drew into the ramp and the referee calls for the bell.
No Contest
After the match, Drew is sent into the WWE logo on the stage.
Show sets for a choke slam of McIntyre off the stage, but from out of nowhere Mark Henry with a running shoulder block and they all go off the stage. Officials check on Henry, Show, and McIntyre as we go to commercial.
We are back and Mark Henry is limping away as he refuses help from the officials.
We then see footage from earlier tonight when Alberto Del Rio attacked the six men in the tag match who are in the Money in the Bank match.
It is time for a Money in the Bank retrospective video package.
It is time to run through the card for Money in the Bank.
Vince McMahon and CM Punk are walking in split screen as we go to commercial.
Did You Know that Smackdown is the number one rated show on SyFy for the last 40 weeks.
Vince McMahon makes his way out, but he decides to go to the back. Vince gets a better reaction and he does the walk but he decides to go to the back again. Vince finally makes his way to the ring as only Vince McMahon can.
Vince takes a moment to say hello to John Cena Sr. before getting into the ring.
We have a new type of table in the ring.
Vince wants the fans to acknowledge who he is. Vince says that he will not be joining the CM Punk Kiss My Ass Club. Vince says that he could never do anything like that. He says that it is a bit bothersome because it is supposed to be a public negotiation.
Vince says that contracts should not be negotiated in public, but nonetheless that is what CM Punk wants. Vince asks for Punk to make his way to the ring.
Vince offers his hand to Punk, but Punk refuses.
Vince says that everything in the contract is there. Vince says that even Punk’s request for his own collector’s cup is in there.
Punk introduces Vince with ‘What a Maneuver’. Punk can’t believe that Vince is going through this. He says that he expected Vince to be in the red shirt with the arm bands because he is so pro-Cena. Punk says that Vince does not think Cena can win on Sunday.
Vince says that he wants Punk to sign the contract for the right reasons. This will give Punk a lot more money. Then he could not live with Punk walking out of Chicago with his title on the last day of his contract.
Vince asks Phil if this is okay.
Punk says that if they want to have fun, let’s have fun. Punk says that the contract wasn’t up to par so he has a new contract. Punk says that he already signed the contract so he wants Vince to sign it.
Punk says that there are a few perks. Punk says that we should ask the WWE Universe if this should go down in public and the fans want to hear it.
Punk asks Vince if someone stooged him off about the contract. Punk says that he gets to push Vince and he gives Vince a light tap. Punk says that he will kick Vince in the nuts and Vince will smile and like it. He tells Vince that he will show him respect or Punk finds the nearest shredder and walks out with the WWE Title. Punk says that he wants his own jet, not the WWE Jet. Punk says that his face will be on everything. He wants it on the TitanTron, turnbuckles, and everything else. Punk wants the WWE Ice Cream bars brought back. Punk tells Vince that he just .
He wants WWE Films to start making CM Punk: The Movie. He says that it can be called Chaperone 2, but it will be funny, entertaining, and successful. The main event of Wrestlemania of John Cena versus Vince’s buddy Dwayne. He says that is the Rock for those who don’t watch Disney movies. Punk says that his match will be the main event. Punk says that there are a few of the perks he had added. Punk says that the contract says that Vince will apologize to Punk for suspending him. He will apologize to the people for being one of the biggest hypocrites. As for the anti-bullying campaign, he says that Vince is one of the biggest bullies he has ever met. He wants Vince to apologize. Punk says that he had friends who were talented and were unceremonially fired. He says that Vince doesn’t know what people want in 2011. Punk mentions guys like Colt Cabana and Luke Gallows. Vince will apologize to Punk for them because they are not here. Punk says that he is the voice of the voiceless. Vince will apologize and he will like it.
Vince wants Punk to calm down so they can sign the contract. Vince wants them to be gentlemen. Punk wants to know if they should be gentlemen or should Vince apologize.
Punk tells Vince to sign the contract and apologize to prevent his company from suffering any further embarrassment.
Punk moves the table out of the way and Vince stands up.
The fans chant ‘We Want Ice Cream’ and Vince says that he doesn’t give a damn.
Punk says that is the problem that Vince doesn’t care. Punk says that he cares too much and he might not wear the white hat, but he knows what the people want. Punk says that the people of Boston want an apology.
Vince says that he is sorry, but it is a little half hearted. Punk throws out a ‘what’ over the apology from Vince.
Vince tells the son of a bitch that he apologizes and Punk gets on the turnbuckles and he says that this is better than winning the World Title three times.
Punk tells Vince to sign the contract before the stock plummets more.
Before Vince can sign the contract, John Cena’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring. Vince thinks that things are fine with Cena in the ring. He tells Punk that was a fine speech. He says that the people will love him in Chicago and that is the night that he walks out on each and every one of them. Cena says that he is not going to say anything to Vince about caving in to a terrorist. Cena calls Punk and Vince a couple of spoiled brats. Cena says that Punk hates Vince, but he hates Vince too. He might hate Vince, but he comes to work every day. Cena says that when he has a problem with Vince, he still comes to work because of the people.
Cena says that Punk is the biggest hypocrite of them all. He asks the people if they want to see an apology but then he leaves. There was a man who said ‘Finally . . . he was home’ and then he said that he was never leaving. Cena says that he knows that Punk is not that guy, but Punk is making a bunch of demands that Vince will never agree to. Cena says that Punk is his own worst enemy.
Punk says that he is not going to let Cena say that he has lost sight of things. Punk says that he is going to walk out of here with the title because he is not part of that mold. Punk says that Cena sees Punk as the kid who couldn’t hang. Punk says that he hung off Cena’s gangster car at Wrestlemania 22 looking as foolish as Vince does in his suit. Punk said at that time, he was going to see John Cena in the ring, going down to CM Punk.
We are in Cena’s home town tonight and next week we will be in his home town. Punk says that Cena has lost sight. Punk says that Cena portrays himself as the underdog, just like every Boston sports team. Punk says that John lost sight of this but he is glad that Cena’s wife and father are in the front row. John Cena is everything that he hates. Punk says that he is no longer the underdog, he is the dynasty. He has become the New York Yankees.
Cena slaps Punk and Punk leaves the ring. He says that Vince is Steinbrenner and Cena might as well be Jeter.
Punk sits down and he has something else to say. Punk says that everyone wants to hear it. He says that he is glad that Cena punched him. Punk says that he realized why he wants to leave. He says that he is tired of this and he is tired of Cena. Punk tells Vince, John, and the WWE Universe to say goodbye to the WWE Title and John Cena. He says to say goodbye to CM Punk as Punk rips up the contract.
Punk says that he is going to be the best in the world somewhere else. Punk does the ‘You Can’t See Me’ gesture.
We go to credits.
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